Before The Now

now

            I arch my back against the table.
           "Now, before you go mental, I thought I would tell you why."
             Sloane can't be talking. Sloane is dead! She killed herself. She jumped off an Iron Heights workshop.
             "I know you hate me. Nio, babe, you should. I screwed your life."
              You screwed my life?
             "But there is a lot you didn't know."
              You wouldn't talk to me. You told me to leave, to get away while I could. What the hell was I supposed to do?
              "For example, we weren't going to be married. You thought we were, but I promised my grandfather. I promised I would never marry to someone. He wanted me to wait. It wouldn't have mattered anyways. I already knew in my mind that that was true."
              Sloane, what? Your face is non revealing, as if you had no emotions when you decided. And marriage?
              "I felt so bad. My ring alone was 11000 dollars. I thought we were going to be broke. I screamed at you that day. Not in pleasure, which comes back later, but in anger. I was so, well, mad. That's when my first few thoughts began. I thought, well, I can break your heart or kill you. I chose the one that would let you have another chance with a better girl. One who...
               Her voice breaks off. What is she thinking? This isn't Hannah Baker! This is real! The screen goes blurry for a second, and I hear her. She is crying, so, so, so, quietly. Sloane, talk! Sloane!!!
                "Maybe it would be easier if I just stop this recording. No matter what, you would never see my true love for you. I need a break. I'll start the next clip later."
                Sloane, don't leave me.
                "Goodbye for now my love."
                The video feed goes dead. Sloane is no longer in my sight. I scream her name. I loved her. I loved her so much. Why, Sloane, why?