The Diary of Pinkamena Diane Pie

Rainbow Dash

                  Dear Diary,

          Today was a super day! I got to play with one of my best friends! Dashie! She didn't seem to like our play date though...She even fell asleep! Twice! How rude, am I right?! I had to go buy more adrenaline shots after we finished playing because of that! Of course, we still had some fun though! :) 

When she first arrived, she seemed a bit confused and sad that we were going to be baking cupcakes. (She never was a very good baker! Haha!) Of course, I laughed and relieved her a bit by telling her that I would be doing most of the work anyway, and she seemed to perk up after that. Then came the drugging part, after a little convincing that it was just a "taste testing," she agreed to eat my "special cupcakes". She was out in ten seconds flat!! Also, I wish I had had a stretcher or something because that girl was heavy! I think she had gained weight within the past month or something, but whatever! I still got her to my basement and strapped her to the table. About half an hour later, she finally came around, and as all of my other v̶i̶c̶t̶i̶m̶   playdates are, she was confused and started asking the annoying, "Where am I?","Why am I tied down?", and when they finally realize what I am about to do is serious, they start crying and ask a question that if I had a dime every time I was asked it, I would be rich! They ask "Why are you doing this?" UGH, it is so annoying! However, I was able to see past it so we could get to our  t̶o̶r̶t̶u̶r̶e̶ ̶s̶e̶s̶s̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶  play date! 

I started with the usual, getting my souvenir! I know in Equestria, where Princess Twilight is from, they have this thing called "cutie marks", which would be awesome to keep and treasure. Sadly, this world doesn't have those, but I noticed that everyone at my school wears something with a special symbol on it, in Dashie's case, a lighting bolt! So I grabbed my scissors and cut around her symbol and put it on my table. Rainbow was freaked out then, not scared. She's a dirty minded pervert sometimes. Anyways, after that, I picked up my most favorite weapon of all time: My scalpel. It might be small and in need of sharpening after every play date, but it works for everything! Cutting around small organs, slicing through skin, and even ripping through the optical nerve when I decide to take an eye out! Oops haha, I think I got off topic again. As I was saying, I picked up my scalpel and drug the knife down Dashie's chest and stomach, cutting her shirt, bra, and of course, skin! At this point, Rainbow was screaming in pain, and calling desperately, but helplessly, for help. This continued as I carved hearts, names, and other things into her arms and legs. Then, as I mentioned earlier, she fell asleep! I was really ticked and gave her a lecture she would never forget about manners!  N̶o̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶ ̶s̶h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶u̶l̶d̶ ̶e̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶i̶t̶.̶  

After my lecture, I decided to go ahead and start the harvest. So I followed my routine, slicing her skin to make two flaps on her body, so I was now able to see her outer organs. I started making hilarious puns as I extracted her stomach, liver, kidneys, bladder, lungs, and eventually, her heart. She only lasted forty five minutes, but hey, that's better than only twenty, like with some of my other victims! Well, I gotta go! I got some colorful cupcakes to make! If you know what I mean! Hehe!

                See ya next time, (o̶n̶ ̶m̶y̶ ̶t̶o̶r̶t̶u̶r̶e̶ ̶t̶a̶b̶l̶e̶)

                          Pinkie  (P̶i̶n̶k̶a̶m̶e̶n̶a̶) Pie <3