1. We breathe air. trees make air, homework kills trees, therefore homework kills us.
2. Dear teacher, if the bell doesn't dismiss me, then the bell doesn't decide when I arrive... Case closed.
3. I don't care what your gender is, I'm calling you dude.
4. I'm not the "cute" awkward... I'm the "what the hell is wrong with you" awkward.
5. I will never understand why the smell of girls' perfume lasts 8 secs meanwhile boys can go through an apocalypse and still smell like cologne???
6. As a student the most comforting words you'll ever hear is "I haven't started either"
7. *Turns my fan on high so I can still put on a blanket*
8. When a boy gets jealous, it's kinda cute. But when a girl gets jealous, World War III is about to start.
9. Lazy Rule: Can't reach it, don't need it.
10. Dear Microsoft Word, I'm pretty sure I spelled my name right.
11. "You look pretty today" "Was I ugly yesterday?"
12. Everything is funnier when you're not allowed to laugh.
13. I hate when websites ask: "Are you a human?"... no, I'm a vacuum.
14. It's funny how your parents tell you it's their house, but as soon as something needs cleaning, it magically becomes yours too.
15. Waking up from a great dream, and trying to fall back asleep so you can continue the dream.
16. Who else takes out their headphones and listens to them just to make sure the music isn't loud enough for everyone to hear?
17. I hate when I'm mad at someone and they make me laugh.
18. Checking your phone to see what time it is and checking again because you weren't paying attention the first time.
19. Admit it. We have all tried to keep a diary but failed epically.
20. Turning off the downstairs lights and running upstairs so no one kills you.
