October 2005
The alarm on my nightstand buzzed, persistent as ever in attempt to get me out of bed. I rolled over in the sheets and sat up. My head was throbbing. Great, another hangover. Since I'd left Saturday Night Live months ago, I'd done nothing but party. Every night was the same. I'd meet up with some buddies, have a couple drinks, and wake up hugging my toilet at 4 a.m.
I dragged myself to the kitchen and turned on the coffee pot in hopes of covering the overwhelming stench of alcohol. My apartment never felt "homey". It was cold and empty. In all honesty, I was lonely. So, I spent most nights "out".
The TV was playing in the background and my attention was caught by my own voice. Oh joy, my last SNL rerun. Drew Barrymore was the host. Gosh, was she gorgeous. Just as the memories of that night flashed through my mind, my phone buzzed. Speaking of the angel...
"Hey, Jim. Miss you! You should visit me sometime. -Drew"
I'd known Drew ever since I'd gotten into the business so when she says "you should visit" I know exactly what she means. Drew, being the sweetheart that she is, would occasionally invite me out to "visit" her which would essentially end with an offer I'd always have to turn down. Last time I flew out to LA, she urged me to move there and produce movies with her. She had always wanted to be a producer with a partner in crime. I just didn't feel I should be that partner. New York City is where I belong. I'm a New Yorker. I decided to call her before I wasted a trip that would only end in disappointment for both of us.
-Hey Drew, how's it going?
-Hey Jimmy! How're you holding up?
-I'm doing pretty good.
I rubbed my temples in attempt to calm the pounding.
-That's good to here. Hey listen, you should fly out here to visit.
-Just visit? Drew, c'mon. What's the catch?
-Okay, look. I got this reallllly unbelievable offer to play the lead in a movie.
-Oh my god, that's great, Drew! Congrats!
-Hold on, here's the catch. I need a costar. It's a romantic comedy. A baseball movie, actually. As soon as they told me, you're the first person I thought of.
My heart dropped to my stomach. I couldn't deny her yet again. Why didn't she just ask Adam Sandler? Why me? I'm not an actor. What if the movie flops? Then again, I really needed to get back on my feet. I'd become a bum in the last couple of months. I stood up and wiped the toast crumbs off my chest.
-Jim? You there?
-Yeah, yeah. I'm here. Okay.
-Okay what...?
-I'm in. I'll fly out tomorrow. Meet me at the airport?
-YES! Okay, yes! Thanks so much, Jimmy. You're the greatest. I'll let you pack! Talk to you in the morning. This is going to be great.
-Bye, Drew.
I hung up the phone. A baseball movie? Did I really just sign myself up for this? Hey, it's a rom-com... Maybe I'd get to kiss the one and only.
