I'm Useless, But Not For Long (2D x OC)

C3: At a Bar With Star

I grabbed my phone, throwing on my hat {A/N I have this irl, I'll post a pic of that later!} and slipping on my Converse. {A/N I have these irl too, they look like this: http://www.boots4all.com/images6/c13gdrx.jpg} Star threw on some super shimmery eye shadow that made her eyes stand out, so she was for sure ready to party. It was gray. Looked nice on her. Personally, I already had some on from earlier, on the plane. I was ready to go, but there was somefink missing. The keys! Shit! "Star, where are the keys?" She gave me a confused look.

"The keys to the house?"

"Yeah, those keys. Do you know where they are?"

She gasped. If this was a vid on YouTube, that frog on the unicycle would show up out of nowhere and say "OH SHIT!" "I thought you had them!"

"No! I gave them to you!"

"Well, hang on a sec and I'll go look for them!"

As she dashed upstairs, I couldn't help but fink about how fucked we were. I started biting at my lip, but stopped once I remembered that I was wearing lipstick that was most likely toxic. Thump.

"I found them Chay! LET'S GET WASTED!"

I called our taxi driver while Star locked the house and set the alarm. It was the same guy, luckily for us, and he told us that he'd get here in "about 5 minutes". Great! Star hugged me when she was done. "Again, thanks for doing this with me, Chay. I don't know how I could've done it without you."

"Star, you know I wouldn't let you somefink stupid without doing it myself."

"Yeah. THERE IT IS AGAIN!"

"What?"

"Instead of saying 'ing', you're saying 'fink'!"

I blushed. "Well, it's just 2-D rubbing off on me..."

Right as Star was about to open her mouth to retort, the taxi driver pulled up. We waved hello and got in, and he asked us what exactly we were needing. "Well, I want to go to the BEST bar, with a live rock band and the best booze!" Star chanted that like she was a little kid convincing her parents to buy her somefink. The driver (who later told us his name was Jimmy) took us to this upscale bar looking place that he promised had live music. But, not without telling us about the "Reunification of Led Zeppelin" and other classic rock stuff. It made Star and I laugh, and I gave him some extra Euros that I got from the bank as a tip. He promised to pick us up sometime around 12-ish or somefink, I really don't remember. I was too busy eyeing this place. He was right - there certainly was a live band there. And, honestly, they needed some help.

As Jimmy pulled off, Star gave me a look that told me she thought the same fing that I was finking. This band is trash. We slowly entered the dark building, and boy were we surprised! It was upscale, like Jimmy said, but the band was full of old people! Yes, old people! No wonder they needed some help! Mainly, the vocals and drums though, but I'll give them credit. For being in their 80s (at least), they were pretty good. Star tugged at my shirt and dragged me to the bar, where the bartender was flirting with two guys at the end of the table. Ewww... I thought. She's way to old for them! She finally noticed us. "So, what can I git yew two ladies?" Her accent was thick, but I was used to it from listening to all of the Gorillaz interviews. "Um.. hi... yes. We just moved here from Memphis, Tennessee, and we were wondering what exactly you have to drink."

I nearly punched Star for exclaiming that as loud as she did. Now, reader, you didn't know this, but we agreed to keep it a secret that we just moved here until a little later, but here she was shouting it for the whole bar to hear! The woman gave a crooked smile. "Ah, Americans. We don't have many of those that pass through here." The way that she said "those" really unnerved me. I mean, it didn't help that she looked like a tough bitch that beat people up! Her short brown hair was in a ponytail and from her thin shirt, you could see that she had some serious muscles. "I thought so! Well, that's one way that makes us unique!" I nervously chuckled. She let out a cackle that made her sound about a 100 times eviler. "Well, welcome to Essex! I think you'll like it here! I think you'll like this, too." She poured us each a shot of Jack Daniel's, grinning. We both thanked her and, while Star just downed it, I actually enjoyed it.