I promised myself I won't cry. I won't cry for you. I said to myself that I will be okay. Not letting myself go down that lane. That if I went too deep, I will still hold on to me, to myself.
But too bad I was l already to far in with you. I'm already not my usual optimistic self. I'm no longer smiling at everything I see. I'm no longer laughing at everything that's not even funny. I'm no longer laughing at that joke that passed twenty minutes ago. I'm no longer me.
I gave you everything. I gave you all my quotes that I loved, but you found them silly. I gave you all my best advise, but you always see their faults. I gave you smile, but you didn't even see that. That I was trying.
Again!!
And after that... became the over thinking. The questioning, why am I still here? Why am I still trying? Why am I hurting myself for someone, who seems like they don't even appreciate it?
The tears that fell make it seems all too real. I don't cry
Yet I cried for you.
I always give up on people.
I am still here always here for you.
The one time I let someone in so much. They made me cry. But sadly I am not blaming someone for what happened, for making me cry, not even myself... I'm just wondering what happens next?
After making me fall... What will happen?
After the expectations... What will happen?
After the tears... What will happen?
What will happen... To us?
