"Peace, beloved, be still. I know what you meant and I didn't take it as a complaint. I just thought maybe you have something specific in mind to do this year, something you've been wanting to do, but have been putting off?" He said.
I was speechless for a minute. The first part of what he said was delivered in such a way that all the anxiety that had started bubbling and boiling inside me just dissipated, like fog in a gentle breeze. I'd begun working myself into a frenzy, afraid I'd pissed him off with my ungratefulness. It's not that I'm not grateful, I truly am, especially since his gifts are always so wonderful, it's that I have gotten used to doing my birthdays that way and I wasn't expecting the change in the routine. But his voice just seemed to wrap around me, cacooning me in peace. I actually could have sighed in contentment at the feeling.
"Of course I have time to meet you, Father. When and where?" I asked, sort of breathlessly.
He gave me another one of those soft chuckles, then said, "Let's meet at the pier at noon, hm?. We can have some of those fried oysters in lemon juice, you like so much."
I nearly fell out of my bed! I had literally been craving those oysters last night, but it was too late to get any, the pier was closed when I wanted them. How the heck does he do that? How does he know just what would please me, every time? I was so caught up in being startled, that I forgot to answer him.
"If you would prefer to do something else..." he started, but I jumped in quickly, just noticing how long it had taken me to respond.
"No, no! The pier would be great!" Too late again, I realized that I'd interrupted the Father midsentence! Oh, crap!
"Oh my goodness, Father, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to be rude, please forgive me!" My eyes were beginning to tear up and my nose was getting stuffy.
"Jodi, calm yourself, please. You're getting all worked up for no reason. I am your father, not your warden. You are my daughter, not my prisoner. We have a relationship, not an arrangement. I want you to be who you are with me, the 'real you', not some animated mannequin. I love who YOU are, just for who you are. I like the true person you are when you're not trying to be perfect. Do you think you can just relax and give me THAT daughter? I promise, you will be happier with that, as well." His voice had, once again, taken on that gentle, nurturing quality that touched me deep in my heart and made me want to crawl up into his lap and lay my head on his chest, while he wrapped me up in his strong arms.
I sighed softly and said, "Yes, Father, I will try to remember that."
"Then, I look forward to our afternoon, loved one. Enjoy your morning." And he was gone.
I felt so drained suddenly, like I'd been through two rinse cycles in a washing machine. It would be nice to just let go and be myself, for once, instead of being on tiptoes and walking on eggshells all the time. I wonder if I can actually do it, though? And then I thought, how do you relax with the man who doesn't think enough of you to give you his name? Just like that, I was back to being uncertain. *sigh* Oh man, something has got to give!
YOU ARE READING
The Adopted (began 5/8/12)
Short StoryJodi Chambers is approaching her 40th birthday. She was adopted as a child by a wealthy man who has many adopted children. But Jodi has never been able to form a close bond with the man who raised her and gave her everything she has. She lives a qui...
