His Dark Side

Never Forget You(31)

'By each let this be heard,

Each man kills the thing he loves,

Some do it with a bitter look,

Some with a flattering word,

The coward does it with a kiss,

The brave man with a sword.'

                                                                                         ---

It was time to say good bye to Shane.

I had woken up thinking about what to say to Shane. He had been a good friend to me. It made sense now how he recognized me the first he met me. He was Evelyn's cousin, well not me, the other one of course. It was so strange to think that there had been a girl who looked me and had my name. I never had the faintest notion, nothing that had ever made me think that I had another life long ago which made sense because I wasn't her. I just looked like her. I wasn't supernatural. Even when I had those nightmares, the ones Eric made me see, I still never thought it could involve something like this.

Other things were clear too. Eric's hatred for Jules, his affection towards me, the grave in underworld with my name on it, how Derek had been obsessed with me when he first met me and how he followed me around. Although it stung to think that Eric might only love me because I looked like his lost love. Why else would he love me?

It didn't seem like I had anything else in common with her. She was beautiful, even though I looked like her, from the visions Eric showed me I could see she had this heavenly glow about her. She seemed so graceful and extraordinary and I was a mess. I wondered if Eric was more in love with the memories than with me. But for the life of me I couldn't understand why I had become like this. Evil.

There was a knock on the door that snapped me out of my thoughts. I saw Eric enter.

"Guess who?" he said in a playful tone.

I laughed and even to my own ears my laugh sounded unsure, shaky and on the verge of crying. I didn't answer. It felt like I would burst into tears if I tried to say something.

Shane entered the room behind him. He was wearing all black today; black jeans and black v-neck shirt. His eyes met mine and I rushed over to give him a hug. He was so warm. I took a shaky breath trying to steady myself and also hoped he wouldn't notice.

When I pulled away from the hug, Eric was gone. The door was closed. I sat down on the bed and Shane sat down beside me. 

"This dimension isn't all that bad you know," he said. He looked at me. 

"Bad? It's way better than having the same red sky every day." I didn't meet his eyes.

"Yeah well. Maybe."

He took my hand. He was quiet for a while. I didn't know what to say either so I remained silent too. It was raining outside again. I could hear the sound of the rain drops on the roof. I concentrated on the feel of his hand against mine. I felt safe.

"So you know," Shane's voice came.

"I do now," I replied slowly. "It's really strange."

"I know. I mean when I first saw you I was so shocked," he said. He was trying to look me in the eyes but I looked down at my lap instead. I was scared that if I looked at him, he'd know what I was thinking; the conflicting thoughts I was having about my doppelganger.

"What was she like?" I couldn't stop myself.

"She was beautiful. Inside out. I was really close with her." He sighed. I felt my grip tighten on his hand. I felt a pang of jealousy at this but it was completely pointless.

What the hell is wrong with me?

We chatted for a long while, Shane holding my hand throughout before he got up to leave. I walked with him to the main door. This was my last moment with him. Eric was nowhere in sight.

On the inside I was freaking out but I tried hard not to show it. I didn't want to appear weak. I had had enough of that all my life. I finally met Shane's eyes. His eyes seemed like they were searching my soul, like he wanted to know. He was trying hard to find out what I was feeling. I felt irritation bubble up inside me but soon it was replaced by an ache. He was my friend, one of the few I had left. 

I could feel a lump in my throat and tears filled my eyes. If only I could go back in time I could undo this. All of this.  But then I wouldn't have met Eric.

Shane pulled me in for a tight hug. 

"Bye, Evelyn," he whispered in my ear, not letting go of me.

"Bye, Shane." I planted light kiss on his cheek, refusing to cry even though the tears were threatening to fall. He waved once before he drive off. I sighed and turned around to see Eric standing right behind me. He came over and hugged me tight. 

Eric had said that he would be ready to put me down tomorrow. He would kill me. But he still hadn't used those words.

"Eric?" 

"Yeah?"

"I'm bored. Let's go do something."

"Sure. What do you wanna do?" He smiled at me.

"I don't know. Something fun. I'm dying tomorrow. I wanna make the most of the time I have left." He frowned when I said that but it disappeared quickly and he smiled again. He picked me up.

"Let's go then," he said making his way out of the main door towards his car, still carrying me bridal-style.

"We're going to have the day of our lives." He laughed and I couldn't help but let out a giggle too. It had stopped raining and the sun was setting, the birds were flying to their nests. A soft breeze was blowing.

Once we were in the car, he leaned over from the driver's seat and kissed me. Suddenly I was feeling light headed and ecstatic. He stopped kissing me and touched my forehead with his.

It was only then that I realized that Eric had tears in his eyes too. I watched him, my breathing caught in my throat as a tear rolled down his pale cheek.

He was crying.

"Don't." I whispered, my voice cracking a little. It felt like something was ripping my heart out. It was too overwhelming and for a moment I thought I couldn't breath. I couldn't help myself from admiring him in this dim light. He looked so beautiful even like this. I reached out to wipe away his tears as my own tears started gushing. I hugged him tight. 

Everything flashed through my eyes. The first time I saw him, seeing him standing at his balcony and then going to see him. The first time we had kissed. The time when I had thought he had betrayed me, when we got back together and every  single intimate moment we had ever shared. I loved this man so much it hurt. 

And it was all going to end tomorrow. He promised I wouldn't feel a thing. He would slowly put me to sleep. Sleep meant death but he didn't say that. I knew it. I was so scared but more of losing him than of death. 

"I love you," I said softly as if the words were sacred. 

"I love you too." His voice was quiet, so much so that I wasn't sure if I'd heard him at all. 

"I'll never forget you," he said.

 My tears kept coming.  My heart ached. It was like I could feel it physically breaking inside my chest. 

 He kissed me again.