The First and Only Part

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I've never really been chubby in the far past. I was even too skinny for a little while. But when I started third grade maybe, I was slightly "overweight" I personally took this as fat. My mom would just say I was only a little "chubby." This made me feel worse. It made me think that my own mom was trying to bring me down. I was a lot less confident, and I started wearing baggy shirts. There was a voice in the back of my head saying "you're not good enough, skinny enough, pretty enough" When summer time came around, I had to go to the store to try on swimsuits and I remember crying in the changing rooms because bikinis looked awful on me. It was mental torture. When I looked in the mirror, I no longer saw a pretty girl, I saw a fat, ugly creature that couldn't get rid of its problems. My friends never made comments about my weight. They were, and still are, some of the kindest people I know. I was never really bullied because of my size, but some people made comments. I remember this kid Jasper, he flat out said I was fat. I remember not talking to him until our next play rehearsal after he apologized. My friends would say that I was pretty and it honestly made me feel better about myself. My friends were a huge support system for me. They would call me pretty and would never say anything bad about my size. I even found YouTube channels talking about weight and self importance, and it made me think about how I've been treating myself. I realized that being a bit curvy was okay and that I was beautiful because I was accepting myself, and that was what mattered at that moment. I was silencing the voice that fed me those negative thoughts. Sure, sometimes I do wish I was thinner, and that's okay because I'm not making that the only thing I think about. So, to the readers reading this story, you are beautiful just the way you are. And never change for other people. Thank you for reading.
   
                                                       -Gia

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