Love is when you experience pain, lies and broken promises.
I was thirteen when I witness my parents BETRAYAL.
"Raga, meet your Tito Carlo" My mom was with a middle aged man, looking so strict and hard. He was intimidating but he slightly smiled at me. We ate and talk at the restaurant that day.
"Raga, this is my friend Christina Ferrel. Christina this is my daughter Raga." Dad was with a petite woman with a smiling face and a heart warming aura. I smiled at her and shaked her hand.
My parents love was a short time feeling. It changed and vanished.
"Let's divorce then Rafael. We don't need to prolong this agony. This marriage is a failure we can't make it work anymore." My mom was shouting at the living room with my father.
"How about Raga?" Dad asked while massaging his temple.
"Hindi na bata si Raga she can understand." My mom answered.
What? Mom, I don't understand.
I thought THEY love each other.
No, no, I can't let them separate, dad will not let it.
"Okay, let's talk to her tomorrow." Dad said and left my mother behind. He climbed up to the stairs. I immediately run to my room and locked the door.
How could they!! I thought, at least dad would disapproved, but I was wrong.
Her love made her vulnerable
One night.
"You understand right? I will be happy if I AM with your Tito Carlo. I love him Raga, please accept us, I can't live without him and he can be your second dad. He will be nice to you. Okay?" Mom pleaded, she looked so sad. So? She wants this kind of love.
She was crying, this is the first time I saw her cry. She might really love that man. Though her love makes her weak.
I just nodded for acceptance and wiped her tears. She kissed my forehead and she left me.
I didn't saw her after that.
His LOVE makes him DISTANT
"Darling, I just want you to know that me ad your tita Christina is already engaged." He said to me while holding my shoulders, he was smiling and that made me happy a bit. It was good, at least one of us can be happy.
Tita Christina was beside my dad she was also smiling and teary eyed.
"Okay, dad. but are you going to leave me like mom? I asked him.
"Of course not darling." He immediately replied.
But it was another lie.
"You live with your mom Raga, we will be leaving to US next week for a better medical attention for Christina. We can't bring you, you don't have a passport and it takes time to have you one." He said with so much coldness. He was like this after tita Christina was hospitalized and discovered that she has a breast cancer. Stage 2.
The cancer was spreading so THEY decided to go to US for better technologies .
Then, I was with my mom for a couple of years.
Her LOVE made her forget someone she own.
And I knew this day would come...
"Your dad, they came back last week, he said you can live with them and take your degree there. This might be hard for you because of the short notice. Together with Carlo, we decided to agree with your fathers offer." she said
Again you didn't asked me for my opinion. YEAH!! OF COURSE! This is what you want, this is what you planned and this is what you all have been praying for. Right?
"Okay." I don't have the will to argue because again I understand.
"You'll be leaving a week after your graduation, so make sure your requirements are already intact para iwas delay ng alis mo." She said like nothing. She moves to leave my room.
"Why in a rush mom?" I asked her before she reach the door. My eyes was fixed to my book but I can see her in my peripheral vision.
"Rhoan doesn't want you here. Carlo asked me if you can stay with your dad because she can't handle Rhoan's whims. Alam mo naman yung si Rhoan masyadond spoiled ni Carlo."
At sayo... I want to talk back, but refuse to.
Nothing will change. I just a sigh
"I love your Tito Carlo, Raga, I will comply to what he wants and what he needs. I don't want him to leave me."
She left and closed the door.
Her LOVE made her a MASOCHIST
I close my book and massage my temple.
I walk through my bed and lie down. I covered my eyes with my arms.
You only think about yourselves. Huh! I smirked
After thinking about that. I was welcomed by darkness.
Their LOVE made them selfish.
8-11-17
23:44
