Behind the smile (jalissa)

Ch 9

It was the next day and I took an oth to myself that I wouldn't get "back together" with Jake. I will talk to him when he gets back from work but for now I'm just gonna have a good day since I haven't had one of those in a awhile.

My day went by pretty fast and it was already 5:00 pm so I decided to mark down what I'd done today.

List
-workout
-got groceries (healthy)
- vlogged
-talk to my agency about an upcoming shoot
- spent time with t

I felt pretty good about my dad. I barely thought about Jake. Only when Tessa asked me if I was ok like 10 times. Which I mean I'm not mad about since she was only trying to help but I just wish she wouldn't have said his name.

I was just chilling when I heard the door open. So I thought it must be Jake so I ran over without checking and saw a girl. Tears filled my eyes bc I knew it was one of Jakes girls. So I just said hi and then ran. While I was running up she asked me where Jake was. I said figure it out. I felt bad doing that but like you are going out with the boy I'm in love with.

After I got into my room tears started filling my eyes I messed up my whole room tore it apart piece by piece bc I could hear what they were doing. I could hear them talking and saying they loved each other.

The night went by and almost every team 10 member came into my room and saw if I was ok bc well my room didn't look it. I just asked them to get out I need alone time. It felt good finally saying something on my mind but I would need a whole lot of that to make me feel better. The night goes by and I barely slept.

A week went by and Jake still had this girl. I was kinda surprised bc that the longest he's had someone so all these thoughts went running through my head.

Is she the one

Will he totally ditch me for her

Are we not not a "thing" bc in vlogs we acted like one so

I stopped all them bc I was mentally and physically insane. I couldn't focus on anything I messed up half my shoots and videos. I haven't eating in like 2 days and i look terrible.

I can't believe a boy named Jake paul officially ruined my life bc I'm letting him since I'm in love.

None of this can't be right. How can I still be letting this happen to me. So I went on a walk to try and clear my mind. My doctor said no exercise but I just had too. I had to be as far as this situation as I could.

I decided to go back to the house to tell everyone that I was going to Logans and marks bc marks gonna help me edit. It was somewhat a lie but I didn't really care. I needed to talk to Logan abt it or just have him clear my mind. Let's hope another paul can help me regain my health.

OMG THANK U GUYS SO MUCH FOR 1k READS!!  I SERIOUSLY CANT THANK U ENOUGH!! MORE CHAPTERS COMING SOON!!