Pale walls surrounded me as I lie on my cold bed. Thin white sheets wrapped around my thin poor body. Looking at ceiling, trying to catch some energy to get up, to start another day of my life, let me describe it. My life is the cheapest life ever lol, it's just one day repeating itself for fifteen years now.
I finally got up of the bed to wash my face and brush my teeth, you know... Daily business everybody does...
I don't put on make up, I'm not allowed to. Only in weddings (even with that I'll get dirty looks from everyone) or when no one is home.
The big problem in my life is my dad, I'm grounded all the time, I'm humiliated, I'm not good enough for him to introduce me to his friends or family. For him, I'm dating every boy in the country, when in fact no one even flirted with me once, he's a bipolar, because in a moment, we're best friends and we talk about life and cook and dance and sing together, and the other, he's frowning, grounding me for nothing, yell at me in front of people to show how controlling he is.
And beside all of this he cheat behind our backs, he's always on his phone talking to women, calling them "love" "Darling" "baby" when I thought that those were mum's and mines names.
But I guess I was wrong.
He's a womanizer. Where did I came with that name? Well... I just googled it like the curious girl I am, and all the descriptions of it, fit my dad perfectly.
The second problem, is my mum. She's not sane, so I can't judge her.
School.
My school has different type of students, that's what make it a normal school right? But you gotta have friends to survive or else you'll crash.
That's what happened to me.
My only friend changed school, so It was just me, and I felt kinda alone, but I was like "well it's a school, and it's full of people, I'll sure make new friends right? It's easy just be kinda d to everybody".... Welllll... I was wrong.
To have friends, you have to be a perfect kid from a perfect family that travel every summer to Greece, but that's not me.
But I didn't care when people made jokes of my choice of music and clothes, coz apparently I don't listen to sex and drugs songs and I don't wear slutty clothes, I just brushed it off saying " that my choice and my style, so if you don't like it than leave me alone " so everybody did.
They left me alone. Just like I've wanted.
So after that people thought I was too skinny for their taste so they were mocking me of how a skinny pathetic bitch I was.
I didn't have a strong personality, so I did as everyone told me, I ate and ate and forgot what was sport. And I gained some weigh, not too much, just for people's liking. I had a bigger butt.
After a while, people started mocking me because of how I didn't have accounts on social medias, so I opened an Instagram account.
I became a fan of models and singers, just like every girl in my age, but there was this thing. Everybody loved models bodies, I don't have one. I had one.
But I'm not skinny anymore. I'm fat.
When I was skinny, I was a bitch.
Now I'm not, I'm a loser.
Back to my home. As I enter, the same pale walls greeted me like always, my dad is busy with football on the TV, mum is on the phone, and no one sees me.
Recently, my parents start to forget about me, they don't notice me anymore, and maybe you think I just exaggerated.
I forgot the last time dad or mum called me by my name, actually they don't call anymore.
All that maters for mum is my grades at school.
My dad think I'm 19, when in fact, I'm just 15, he just forgot my age, he think he's been married to mum for 34 years, when actually he's been married to her for 17 years.
I don't know what disease he's cursed with but I hope he'll get well soon.
Anyways, I headed to my room since I don't feel like eating, I stripped from my clothes and changed to more comfy ones, after doing my homework that I have absolutely no idea about what is it. I lied on my bed just starring at the ceiling blankly when an idea popped in my brain.
What if I fade away for a bit? Will they notice? Will anyone care? Or miss me?
I guess I'll find our myself.
