I got my luck kasi tulog pa si Ate from the party last night sigurado tanghali na yun magigising. Nagenjoy sya ng husto dahil wala yung asawa nya naiwan sa US at hanggang ngayon wala pa silang anak kasi naman busy silang dalawa palagi.
I'm here in front of the gate of Silvian University kung saan ko kukunin ang aking summer class. Actually, dito din naman ako nag-aaral and fortunately walang summer ang course ko kaya i can have my summer class whatever subject i want to take.
"Hija, magaalas otso na hindi ka pa ba papasok?", tanong sakin ni manong guard habang nakatingin sakin mula sa guard house. Actually, i don't even know why i'm standing here in front of the gate. tsk. Pumunta na ako sa may gate to swipe my ID para makapasok. Technology is really something huh. It makes imaginary things real.
Medyo malayo-layo ang building namin kaya naglalakad ako ngayon papunta dun and as i walk napansin kong unti lang talaga ang estudyante pag summer and advantage yun sa akin. Less eyes, less insults. Sa itsura kong to ngayon? Iilan nalang ang hindi makakapansin.Well hindi naman talaga big deal para sa akin, naaawa lang ako sa mga taong yun dahil they can't manage their time wisely. Kakasabi ko lang see? bunch of eyes are looking at me right now. Buti nalang i have my glasses on and my bangs to hide my quick peek on them, baka maalala ko sila eh makapagthank you man lang ako for acknowledging me.
Maybe you wonder if i have friends? I don't have friends. I only have acquiantances because they just come and go. Kung nakuha na nila ang gusto nila sayo then they will just dump you like a garbage. I don't really like close relationships or any attachments at all. Kahit nga kay ate, hindi kami close pati na rin sa mga godparents namin and kahit kanino. I'm cold? well yes, obviously. It's just like I can't find any reason or explanation why should i have those relationships, attachment, commitment etc.
Honestly, I have a Schizoid Personality Disorder but i don't use it as a reason why i am like this.
Finally, i arrived at my class and buti nalang hindi pa nagstart. I look for a far away chair para komportable para sakin and there 2nd to the last row, the last chair on the left near the window. Wala pa yung teacher so nagbasa muna ako ng book entitled Sister's Keeper, a story about Ana who donate parts of her body to her sister Kate who has a cancer and the sad part was Ana was born for that reason. See? That's how painful and inevitable to commit or have attachments to someone because you have no choice. They force you to do things kahit labag sa loob mo because you have that "relationship" with them.
As I observe, napansin kong kunti lang talaga ang nagenrol ngayong summer mga nasa 15 lang ata kami dito sa Clinical Psychology class. Exciting kasi we will apply what we learned sa Abnormal Psychology last semester. Nagadvance na ako hindi lang dahil sa gusto ko to kasi ito lang ang available na psych subject this summer. Most especially dahil baka maiapply ko to sa disorder ko. Bale MWF lang ang schedule ko nito.
Tapos na ang lecture part at halos lunch break na. So our teacher decided to group as into three para gumawa ng simpleng case study about a person with mental disorder and i got paired up with this guy, nakahood sya, he got big hair at halos natatakpan na yung mukha nya at hindi sya nagsasalita as he move in front of us. And here goes another one with a very unexplanable smile, nakasmile lang sya samin and i found it creepy kasi sa pagkakaalam ko human smiles because of something and hindi dahil wala lang.
"So, hello! Ako nga pala si Skye Zarate", what a. . . common name. Inabot nya yung kamay nya para makipagshakehands.
"And you are?", He's referring to me with his creepy smile again at nakaabot pa rin yung kamay nya. Sa mukha nya mukhang hindi sya dito nagaaral, baka nagcross enrol lang.
"Nessa Collins", hindi ako nakipagshake hands. I just feel i dont have to and mukhang nadisappoint sya and inabot nya naman to dun sa isang guy na kagroup namin.
"and?", he's waiting for his answer but after a minute wala. So we just proceed to our case study. I thought we will waste our time waiting for this guy to give his name.
Skye did the talking part, i did the writing part while the hoodie guy did nothing until we (referring to me and Skye) finished the case study, pinasa na namin sa prof and eksakto lunch break na.
"Hey Nessa" i was about to go out ng marinig ko si Skye na tinawag ang pangalan ko. Lumingon ako sakanya with a blank face, i guess.
"May kasama ka bang maglunch? Tara sabay na tayo" aya nya sakin cheerfully.
"Look Sky. I'm not really the type of person na nakikipagkaibigan. I'm just here to study, that's all", i confronted him ng maaga para hindi na sya magaksaya ng panahon sa akin.
Hindi ko na hinintay yung sagot nya and i started walking towards the library.
I am searching a book about Clinical Psychology when i bumped into something or i guess someone. Si hoodie guy.
Tumingila lang sya then tumayo lang and umalis na. Napansin kong may book kung saan sya galing,and it's about Arithmetic.
BINABASA MO ANG
Maze of Heart
Teen FictionNessa is a kind of person who doesn't want any change in her life. She chose to become cold as dead to everybody and to anybody. But what if her mind and fate played with her? Can she move one step forward to face the change? or just stay the same?
