Authors note: Trigger warning (Self harm).
~Phil's POV~
German. I've never been to Germany, probably never will. So whats the point of learning the language. I was sat in the middle row next to a tall girl with long wavy brown hair which contained what looked like pale, natural blonde streaks. On the other side of me was a quite bulky boy who was just leaning into the back his chair throwing tiny bits of rubber at the boys head in front. How childish.
I look two rows behind me to see Dan. He's sitting between two mean looking boys, both quite tall and muscly, most probably the populars. I watch them for a while, every now and again kicking Dan's legs under the table and throwing insults at him at the speed of a machine gun. What's worse is the smirk on each boy's face as if they find bullying pleasureable.
I turn away. The clock in the classroom is right opposite me on the wall. 5 minutes to go. I turn my attention to the left to find my german teacher staring down at me.
"I hope you have a good reason why your page is blank, Phillip." she says in a voice both intimidating and soft.
"Yes miss, I don't know any german" I say.
"Well if you did the work, you might know some by now"
I'm guessing I didn't get off at a very good start with her.
"Right, stand behind your chairs" She shouts, so the whole class can hear.
The whole class follows her instruction, as they do when she tells us to leave.
I walk into the corridor taken aghast at the amount of people rushing through the corridors desperate for break, pushing people out the way, slamming them into walls. I wait outside the class for Dan, I mean I don't have anyone else.
"Hi" He says.
"It's okay, really, I'm not going to hurt you." He looks into my eyes, and his face suddenly changes as he realises thst I wasn't lying. "Come on" I say.
We sit on a green moss covered wall, away from most o the students here. Dan doesn't say anything, he just stares at me. Any other person, and I would feel uncomfortable, but, I don't.
Dan grabs my hand and I pull away quickly. I don't know why I did it. I go to grab his hand again, but he's gone.
I see him hurdle over the school gate and run round the corners of the adjacent street.
~Dan's POV~
Fuck. What was I thinking? I ruined it. I ruined everything. I finally had a chance in friendship, and I ruined it in the first 2 hours. I'm such an idiot. I run, turning the corners as quick as I possibly can.
"Oi! Faggot!"
Oh shit. I turn my head to see Chuck and his friend who I don't know the name of. I immediately pick up my pace, I can almost see my house coming into view, I just need to get there. But Chuck is faster than I am, and is catching up to me fast.
I feel a blow to my head, as Chuck's fist collides with my skull. He uses his foot to puch into the small of my back, throwing me to the floor in pain. He bends down over me and wraps his large muscualr hands around my neck. He squeezes till I pass out. I wake up to find him pulling a knife out of his jacket pocket, he couldn't kill me. Instead, he dragged the blade across my face leaving a trail of blood. He kicks my face one more time, before he runs off leaving me a bloody mess on the floor.
I try and pull myself up onto my feet, but I just flop straight back to the floor again. I put my hands in the potholes located nearly everywher on the road, and pull my self along the soft tarmac surface.
Once I reach my house I have regained little feeling in my legs and am able to slightly walk, I pull my house keys out of my pocket and unlock the front door. I kicked off my shoes and ran upstairs, I chucked my bag onto my bed and went to my window. There were no cars in the drive. Good. I'm alone.
I walk into the bathroom and stare into the mirror above the white ceramic sink. What am I? The reflection that stares back at me, is not me. It's what I feel inside.
On the right hand side of the sink is a metallic pot filled with my families toothbrushes and the toothpaste we share. I lift it up to reveal my old razor blade lying underneath. I don't want to do this.
Reluctantly and with trembling hands I lift it off of the surface. I drag the blade swiftly across the skin of my arm. Once. Twice. Three times. Again, and again, and again. Gradually the cuts become deeper, blood starting to seep out of the open cut. Soothing the raw raw skin as it travels down my arm and into the sink.
'We're home!" She says as my dog runs up to greet her.
My mum's chirpy, happy voice. I shove the blade back under the pot and wash out the sink as quickly as I could. I look up into the mirror, how do I explain?
"Hello" I shout, trying to sound happy but I can't banish the choked up sound that leaves my mouth along with the word.
"Daniel, whats wrong?" she says, I can here the concern in her voice. "Let me see you" Damn, I'm home early, of course she's going to be worried.
"No" I mutter, "Nothings wrong."
I hear her footsteps walk into the kitchen. Thank god. She's gone. Instead, I hear her remove her shoes and walk up the stairs.
She looks aghast at the sight of my bloody and bruised face.
"Dan, we have to do something about this. Shall we move schools?" To be honest, I couldn't care less what school I'm at, I'm still going to be bullied. But anything to help her believe that I'm safe. I open my mouth to agree, but a name enters my head, that changes my opinion instantly.
Phil.
