one hundred sleepless nights//klance

Chapter Three

"Shiro?"

The Black Lion was down, its eyes no longer lit up. It wasn't moving. Nobody else was around, not even Red. I couldn't tell where I was. It was barren, that was for sure. The ground was eroding away, gray dust floating up all around me in a thick fog. Some of it clung to the walls of my lungs as I took in the tiniest breath, choking on the fragments of what seemed to me was a decaying planet. I started to press through the wind, the gusts suffocating me more and more, even with my mouth covered. He had to be in there. Dead or alive, there was no way I would ever leave here without him. As I approached, the lion seemed to awaken. Its jaw extended open and I stepped in cautiously.

"Okay buddy." The controls lit up around me but I didn't dare move from the back, behind his chair and controls. I would never take his place. "Where's Shiro?"

There was no response. From where I was standing, I could see his hand. It was bent oddly far in front of him. There was no way he would be dead. Shiro would never take on something he couldn't handle. I was the one, out of all of us, who would do that. Unless, he was trying to protect one of us. I closed my eyes, took in a deep breath, and made my way to the side of him. I would open my eyes, and he'd be there. Injured, but breathing. 

I wish I had kept them shut.

Blood was everywhere. It poured from his chest, soaking the floor around him. Sparks were going off at the base of the controls, and I didn't know how long much longer they would last. I knelt down in front of Shiro, his blood soaking my knees. There was no life left in him. His eyes stared into mine, permanently frozen in fear. I shook his corpse, tears in my eyes. 

"Shiro." I sobbed, holding him close. "Come on. You can wake up. We'll get you home. I'm not letting you die out here. I need you."

I cried into his shoulder, holding onto his body like a child. Something wasn't right with his, though. I could feel something jabbing into one of my ribs. I looked down through my hazy vision and saw my knife, right in his heart. The one that only I knew I had, always hidden under my pillow every night for safe keeping and kept by my side at all times. I felt my heart sink.

I killed him. 

I didn't hesitate to pull it out, slipping and crashing into the panel. It opened up, like mine did when it wanted me to put my bayard in it. What was different was that it looked like my knife would fit into it. I couldn't have killed him, no matter what it was for. He was the closest to a brother I ever had, and there was no way I'd be able to hurt what family this world gave me. The slot was screaming for me to shove the knife in and unlock whatever dark secrets this lion had to offer. I slid my back down against the controls, burying my face in sticky, stained hands. The blood of a champion.

Someone I'd never be able to compare to.

"I can't." I could feel the tears falling harder now. "I want to go back to the castle."

"You can." A voice called. "Just open your eyes."

"My eyes are open!" I yelled, throwing my knife at the roof of the lion. "Shiro's gone! I'm going to have to lead Voltron but I don't know how!"

"You can lead Voltron." The voice assured me. "Just not today. He's not gone. Wake up, Keith."

My head was spinning. Red, black, white, all meshing together in my eyes to create a blur of blatant pain. I tried reaching out to Shiro but to no avail. My face sunk into the floor, salt and iron mixing into a puddle I wished was deep enough to drown in. I lifted my head up one more time, in an attempt to beg for mercy.