The diary of a daydreamer :)

Augest 17th

Journal,

This is my first entry so I might as well introduce myself. I'm Chelsea. But everyone calls me Karter. Well almost everyone. My family and certain friends don't, and honestly I would rather be called karter instead of Chelsea. I just like it a lot better.
Anyways if you must know I'm 15 years old. At times I may not look it. Or act it. But I am. And I live in a small town. With a LOT of siblings. I have 5 to be precise. I have 4 brothers and 1 sister. And honestly, even though I hate the idea of siblings. I couldn't trade them for anything. They're one of the only things keeping me sane. I also live with my mom and dad. Yep, that's right the same mom and dad since birth. I mean. Who else would wanna live with that many kids?
I might as well give you an idea of what I look like. I'm tall 5 foot 7 inches to be exact. And I'm not fat. But I'm not super skinny. I'm just in between. And I'd like to stay that way. And I'm PALE. Super pale. I've never had a tan. Ever. And there's not much to say about my face. I mean I'm not ugly, nor am I beautiful. I'm just kinda.. well.. normal. I lot of people even say I have similarities to Miley Cyrus. Which I don't see.. at all. I have kinda big aqua marine eyes. And a small upturned nose that's covered in small freckles. Trust me. At times you don't see my freckles. But they're there. And that goes To match to somewhat fat lips. I also have a round face and medium length blonde hair. It's not beautiful hair like you see on tv. Oh no. It's annoying, thin, frizzy hair that always gets in the way. I'm not to fond of my looks. But eh. I'm okay with it. I'd rather look like this than a Jim Carey look alike.
Since I covered how I look I might as well tell you about some of the things I like. I don't like I lot of stuff so it isn't gonna be very long. So I'll just make a list.
1.) music (5sos, all time low, paramore..etc)
2.) books
3.) writing
4.) food (of course)
5.) school
6.) vampires
7.) skateboards
8.) family
9.) DOGS.
10.) being alone (at times not all the time)
11.) anything David bowie
12.) long car rides
13.) concerts

So yerp. That's my list of things I like. Not a lot of people know the real me soo. There it is.
I never actually tell a lot of people who I really am. I guess I'm just scared of judgement who knows. You can't trust anyone anymore. Not with the way social media has molded our minds. And trust me, if anyone found out I like vampires. I'll be the laughing stock of my high school.
Did I mention I'm in high school? Yea. That's right. I'm a sophomore at Tully high school. I couldn't exactly tell you what it's like there. I just transferred there from homer high school. And to be honest. Even though I hate homer. I'd rather go there than Tully schools. I mean I don't hate Tully... just the people in it. And my only friends in that place just graduated. So I'm going to be like a lost puppy when school starts again.
I wish I was back in homer. But of course my parents say they'd rather die than send me to a place like homer ever again.

Yea, after the transfer my parents and I don't exactly see eye to eye. They act like they hate me. Which is super frustrating. But after awhile you get used to it. I'm not their perfect child. I wear all black and I listen to rock music. I change my hair color every week. And I have face piercings. Yea... they don't like it very much. They used to have everyone believing that I was this little princess. Wearing all pink all the time. Making me sing. (And in case if your wondering. Yes, yes I can sing. I'm pretty good at it to. I just get nervous around others.) and forcing me to do beauty pageants... ew. Just the thought of it makes me sick..

Anyways I should tell you about my friends. I don't have a lot. I'm not popular, or cool. I'm actually just weird. But I'd rather be weird with these people than with anyone else. I should start with my best friend. Tiernyn. Her birthday was like two days ago. So she just turned 15. But tiernyn has been my friend since fifth grade. We "accidentally" became friends after we were partnered in English. She tossed the bean bag a little to hard and it hit me in the face. After that we just kinda became friends. My next friend I wanna talk about is Megan. We met in seventh grade. We sat next to each other and we always told the kid behind her to shut up. So I guess we became friends after that. We aren't exactly close anymore. But she's still one of my best friends. The next one is Brooke. We didn't exactly become close friends until halfway through this summer. But she's an amazing person and really cool to hang out with. Then there's Thomas. Thomas. He's my brainiac friend. I met him in fourth grade. He was saying some interesting fact and I interrupted him by belching loudly. Yea Ive never been girly. Ever. Anyways thomas is Always making valid points and always making you laugh. I don't understand why he would want to be friends with a moron like me. But I guess he thinks I'm a good person. And then there's Holden... Holden Kenneth wheeler. He's not you're picture perfect boy. As a matter of fact he's not all that attractive. He's a little ugly really. He has these ears... like dumbo big. But I met him my freshman year. it was his junior year so I'm surprised he was even in that class. But anyways yes. I did meet him in a music theory class. We sat next to each other. And at first. He annoyed the crap out of me. He was loud and disruptive. And just plain out rude. But one day in the class. I was going to punch the boy next to him. And well he stopped me. And at that moment I made direct eye contact with him... and yes after that. I was in love with the boy I hated. After that I spent most of my ninth grade year trying to get him to like me back. I missed the bus. I skipped class. I punched someone because they called him pathetic. And none of it worked.
Until I switched schools. Then he messaged me telling me he liked me and asked me out. And out of pure joy I said yes. But little did I know that a month and five days later. 5 days after my birthday. He dumps me. And I was crushed. I didn't talk to him for two months after that.
And after summer school had started. We both got involved with stupid drama that never should have happened. And after it was all over. We decided to just be friends.
But even though we decided to be friends. I still care deeply for him. I just don't want him to know it. I don't want anyone to know. I just keep it to myself.

Anyways enough about friends. I might as well tell you why I'm writing this. And well. My life has been nothing but ups and downs. But it's never been this bad before. So this is why I'm writing this. To get my story out there. To show the world that even kids like me have feelings too. So anyways I might as well say good night. Considering I can't think of anything else to write. But I'll write some more tomorrow.
Also I added a little video of my favorite we are the in crowd song. It's called rumor mill, you should really listen to it. It's really great! Well Bye!

- Chelsea (Karter)
:)