The Aftermath

A FaGILiar Song

A FaGILiar Song

It was two days after Uma and Harry's private sailing trip. Gil had been down for a while. It had Uma and Harry worried sick. Now that they were happy being together in secret it pained them extremely to see their friend so down. They had an idea to cheer him up. Gil had told them the tale of LeFou singing for his dad proudly so many times before. They all knew the lyrics to the song. They decided that this was the way to cheer him up. That morning Gil walked onto the dock. The moment he stepped on the deck of the boat he saw that something was wrong. There was a chair on the deck and a set of tables with benches. The chair looked exactly like Gaston's chair, Gil noticed. What a nice touch to their ship! Then one of the Wharf Rats came down and pushed Gil down in the chair. Harry started massaging his shoulders. Harry started to sing.

[Harry]

Gosh, it disturbs me to see you Gil

Looking so down in the dumps

Every guy here'd love to be you, Gil!

Even when taking your lumps

There's no man in town as admired as you

You're everyone's favorite guy

Everyone's awed and inspired by you

And it's not very hard to see why

~Harry let one of the Wharf Rats take over the task of massaging Gil's shoulders. He jumped onto the tables and started dancing with Uma. Gil's smile seemed to light up the Isle.~

No one's slick as Gil

No one's quick as Gil

No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gil

For there's no man in town half as manly

~ The crew joined in.~

[Wharf Rats]

Perfect, a pure paragon!

~Uma walked towards the Wharf Rats and pointed per name towards one of the crew. They had never seen Gil that happy before.~

[Harry & Uma/Wharf Rats]

You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley

And they'll tell you whose team they'd prefer to be on

Who plays darts like Gaston?

Who breaks hearts like Gaston?

Who's much more than the sum of his parts like Gaston?

~Gil knew his part and choreography and stood up. He started to sing his part with an enormous smile.~

[Gil]

As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating!

[ALL]

My, what a guy, that Gaston!

[Gil]

I needed encouragement

Thank you, Harry and Uma

[Uma]

Well, there's no one as easy to bolster as you! ~she hugged him~

Too much?

[Gil]

...Yep

[ALL]

No one fights like Gaston

Douses lights like Gaston

[Harry]

In a wrestling match, nobody bites like Gaston

[Gil]

When I hunt, I sneak up with my quiver

And beasts of the field say a prayer

First, I carefully aim for the liver

Then I shoot from behind

[Uma]

Is that fair?

[Gil]

I don't care

[ALL]

No one hits like Gaston

Matches wits like Gaston

[Harry]

In a spitting match, nobody spits like Gaston

[Gil]

I'm especially good at expectorating!

[spits] ~Harry caught it in a pot, just like LeFou had once done for Gaston.~

[ALL]

Ten points for Gaston!

[Gil]

When I was a lad, I ate four dozen eggs

Every morning to help me get large

And now that I'm grown, I eat five dozen eggs

So I'm roughly the size of a barge!

[Uma/Wharf Rats]

Who has brains like Gil?

Entertains like Gil?

[Gil]

Who can make up these endless refrains like Gaston's son?

I use antlers in all of my decorating

[ALL]

Say it again

Who's a man among men?

Who's the super success?

Don't you know? Can't you guess?

Ask his fans and his five hangers-on

There's just one guy in town

Who's got all of it down...

[Harry]

And his name's G-I...L...

I believe there's another L...

It just occurred to me that I'm illiterate

And I've never actually had to spell it out loud before...

[ALL]

Gil!

They didn't understood how happy they made Gil. Gil had had another fight with his dad. His dad said he could never live up to his name. He should have seen him! The three best friends quickly hugged before returning to their daily tasks. Uma and Harry had agreed that if Gil didn't ask where they got the chair, they wouldn't tell him they stole it from Gaston.

The lyrics are from the live action remake of Beauty and the Beast. The next chapter will be up soon!