Home Run || j.m.b [ON HOLD]

08 | fine

"'What's nine plus ten' is so old," I hear Lizzie whine from next to me, commenting at a video she's watching from YouTube. "Can't you update it to something more ... modern?"

We're in a train heading to a footy match Lizzie has been begging for me to come along to. The football season is on and the weather is colder. Winter is just around the corner and to warm myself, I have a cup of hot chocolate in my hands.

Today, the match is held in the evening. Lizzie is wearing a white hoodie, her team jersey layered on top. On her head is a beanie bearing her team colours and to complete her looks, she put red-white-blue stripes on her cheeks with zinc sunscreen. I don't know much about the game, but Lizzie's kind enough to lend me her team scarf - at least I wont look as clueless as I really am.

"What's the time?" I ask.

"Four fifty," Lizzie answers nonchalantly, pressing on another 'funny vines' video to entertain herself.

"Isn't the match at five thirty?" I ask again, "we have to be there fifteen minutes before it starts, right?"

"Nah it's just rumours," she waves off. "Besides, we're nearly there."

I really don't know anything about this.

And Lizzie's right anyway. In five minutes, Lizzie tells me it's time to step off the train. And so we walk to the stadium which is not very far from the station. "You know, if Joey had stayed just three days longer," Lizzie says, "we could've brought him to the first footy game, you know? He would've liked it"

It's been two months since Joey left. Have we been keeping touch? Lately no, not really. At the start though, he messaged me his original phone number as soon as he touched down at LAX. We talked for a few days after that, but slowly, our messages became shorter and shorter until we never text anymore.

I totally get it though. Joey's a busy kid, life as an influencer means you travel a lot and not much time to rest - even though you looked okay, you can't deny that exhaustion is slowly eating up your body. Time is very precious, you have to be careful with it.

This is one of the times where someone being an influencer really affected me. I know, being one is meant to be some kind of role model and all but all I see of Joey is a friend - who I didn't contact for a long period of time.

"Hey," Lizzie calls, waving a hand in front of my face. When I snap out of my thoughts, I look to my right to face her. "Are you okay? You look a little ... deep in thought."

"Yeah, I'm okay," I answer reassuringly.

Sometimes you can outgrow a friend, right? This has got to be one of the times.

"Are you sure?"

"Why would I say I'm fine without being sure?"

"Sometimes people tend to do that," Lizzie tells me as we enter the stadium gates and find our way to the seats.

"Seriously, Alissa, are you -"

"Let's just enjoy the game, yeah?" I cut her off. Lizzie looks at me weirdly before looking ahead of her and cheers when her team makes their way on to the field.

I obviously couldn't focus on the game. What else could you do if you don't understand?

Instead, I find myself staring blankly at my phone, rereading a message I sent to Joey over two weeks ago - which he hasn't read.

Back then, I thought 'oh that's absolutely fine'. Over time, I got annoyed and more annoyed even though I knew I shouldn't.

Whose idea was it to be friends anyway? Not mine, that's for sure.

I've tried everything. His original number, his Australian number (which I knew is impossible because he doesn't even use it), his Instagram and even his Twitter.

Still nothing.

I shouldn't be mad. I know I shouldn't, but I can't help it, you know?

If he doesn't want to be friends anymore then fine.

When he does contact me back, I wont answer.

"You okay?" I hear Lizzie ask me at quarter time.

Looking back at her, I smile. "Yep," I answer, more sure and definite this time.

•

kind of short, a bit of a filler but here i am after weeks of not updating hahaha. im sorry:( but here you go!

p.s. eid mubarak to my muslim friends all over the world♡ may God bless you and your family also✨