Toothpaste
A weird invention with no limits. It literally ranges from the tastiest thing in the world to the worst garbage ever that still is pretty appealing in the weirdest way...well just to my teeth, nothing else. Ugh...
Wanna hear a funny story? I bet your thinking,
"Gee, Eddie. Does this story have anything to do with toothpaste?"
Bet your bottoms and dollars that yes...it most definitely does...most def...
Anyways, back to my story. I had a bad addiction to eating, yes eating... toothpaste. Don't look at me like that!! I bet one of you did the exact same thing too. I'll give you one word: bubblegum. That has got to be the best flavor ever...well that and Aquafresh, ha ha.
My mom would get so irritated at the fact we'd mysteriously run out of the stuff (and no, it wasn't filled with drugs if that's what you're thinking.) Then, one and not-so-fateful day...
I
Get
Busted!
So, my mom walked in the bathroom and caught me. Not with my pants down and my...yeah, but with a tube of toothpaste in my right hand and bubblegum toothpaste all over my mouth. I was like 7, okay? Make like a Kit Kat and give me a break, yeah?
Well...
"Yo, Eddie? Who are you talking to?"
"What?" I said as I looked around the halls.
"Who...are...you...talking to? You've been dazed in front of your locker blabbing about your toothpaste problems."
I scanned from the floor up as my best friend, Math (Matthew), stood next to me. Took awhile considering the amazing fact that this dude stands at 6 foot 4, not to mention he's also a skinny Japanese dude that all the ladies can't get over. Sucks when you're 5 foot 11, blonde haired, blue-eyed and German. I mean, it's not my fault I sound pissed off and scary when I speak in my native tongue sometimes. It's not like I'm not sexy or anything, but how can anyonecompare to a gorgeous Asian boy...not like I'm calling him gorgeous, though he is...you know what? I'm sounding like Julie now.
"HEY BOYS!!"
Speaking of which...
"Hey Julie." Math said as he leaned against his locker.
"Hey guys. Look at you two, always looking so...so...scrumptious." he spoke as he bit his bottom lip.
Yes you guys, I just said he. Julie is also known as Julian, who is a little on the fruity side. If you don't get what I'm trying to say, Julian's gay; but the diva kind of gay, not the major stereotypically kind of gay.
"You guys will never guess what happened."
"What, Forever 21 called saying they want their clothes back?" I teased as I glanced over Julie's attire. He wore these red leggings with a really sexy, white crop top. Not that I'm calling him sexy or...you know what I mean.
"Cailla de la boca, papí." he snapped.
By the way, he's also 6 foot, thin, and Puerto Rican. (That's his catch phrase.)
