{Trigger warning; self harm}
I thought it would get better with time but four months have passed since you left me and the pain is just as bad as it was before.
We were so in love, what happened?
You told me we would be together forever. but you said you couldn't do this anymore.
What does that even mean "You couldnt do this anymore?"
Bullshit.
You were afraid. I didnt mid that you were afraid; its completely normal. But you couldn't look me in the eye after I asked you. We couldve talked through it. We couldve made it work. but you gave me no explanation, no answers, nothing.
You cleared all your stuff from our apartment and I havent seen you since.
I don't go into your room anymore; it reminds me of what could have been.
The memories hurt, they need to go away.
I run into the bathroom, and grab the blades I hid in the medicine cabinet of the apartment. I still lock the doors despite the fact that I live alone.
I take a deep breath before dragging the metal across my damaged skin. It hurts; but I deserve it. Its my fault. Its my fault you left. Its my fault that youre no longer mine. Its my fault that im alone.
I hate myself.
I hate my life.
The blood covered my arms and spilled onto the floor. I sunk to my knees and cried
Its times like these where you would have helped me clean up the mess I made.
