The Grand Reunion [johnny knoxville]

Chapter 15

Chapter Fifteen: The Stunt

"Oh my god! Oh my god! Somebody help me!" I screamed. I was in a small shoe store. There were about twelve customers around and nearly all of them rapidly turned to me.

I grabbed my fake stomach and the little contraption dispensed water down my leg.

"I think my waters have broken!" I shouted even louder and a woman, shocked, ran towards me. Two other women surrounded me.

"I'll phone an ambulance. Just keep calm." She told me, softly. She was trying not to panic, her face was red and her breathing was heavy.

I sat down on a seat that was used for trying on shoes.

"No, don't. I'm fine." I started wobbling towards the exit. The women looked confused.

"No! You're giving birth." She shouted behind me. My pants were dripping with water.

"Oh no, this happens all the time." I replied, strolling out from the shop and proceeding to walk back to the crew's van, which was hidden around the corner from the shop.

"I swear to god, I have never been so embarrassed in my life." I said, to Jeff as soon as I got to the van. He laughed and he was trying to get the footage from the shop.

The crew and I cried with laughter when we saw the women-in-the-shop's faces. They were so confused and concerned by what I was doing.

We did the stunt again, three times. The first time, was in a general store and the store owner looked like he was having a heart attack so I stopped and we explained that it wasn't real.

The second time was by the outside of a pizza place. There were tables of people eating and I started jogging past, stopping near a woman who was leaning against a fence.

"I don't suppose you have any water?" I asked her. She looked in her bag and shook her head.

"I'm sorry but I don't. There should be a store around here" She replied and I nodded. She probably expected me to leave her alone then but I leaned against the fence, still next to her. She grabbed a cigarette from her pocket and lit it.

"Can I have one?" I asked, starting to bug her.

"No." She said, sternly.

"Why?" I asked her, smiling an agonising smile.

"Because you're pregnant." She replied and I started panting. I stood away from the fence and grabbed my stomach, getting the contraption placed at my stomach to dispense water.

She noticed and a horrified look spread on her face.

"I think my waters have just broken!" I screamed and I heard people around me gasp.

"Oh my god!" I heard a man say and I could see quite a few people gather around me. I dropped to the floor and the woman crouched next to me.

"Do you want me to phone an ambulance?" She asked, concerned. I stood back up.

"No, I'm fine. This happens all the time." I, then, started jogging back where I came from. Everybody looked really confused and I couldn't help but laugh on my way back.

The third time was just a really big fail and it was all because of Rick Kosick, who was with the crew that day. He had the responsibility of filling the little 'machine' that was located at my waist, under my clothes, with water each time and he completely forgot when we were about to do it again.

So, I walked down a fairly busy street and started talking to man who standing near a wall.

"Hello." I greeted, standing next to him.

"Hello, do I know you?" He asked, confused.

"No, I just needed to rest. I'm due to give birth in a few weeks." I said.

"Congratulations." He said, awkwardly.

"Thanks." And with that, I started panting and the poor man looked scared shitless.

"I think my waters have broken!" I screamed, grabbing my stomach quickly and to my surprise, no water fell from the bottle.

I came to the realisation that Rick hadn't filled it up and started to blush. The man looked confused.

"I don't think that your waters have broken, Miss." He said, with a sigh of relief.

"I can see that." I said, awkwardly walking away. I turned to where the camera was positioned on the other side of the road and started laughing at how awkward that was. I could see one of the directors laughing really hard so I flipped him off.

"Okay, that was the most embarrassing moment of my life." I said as I got to the van. Jeff and Rick were crying with laughter again.

"I'm so sorry, Lana," Rick said between laughs, "It was just so funny." He erupted into a really hard laugh again and Jeff did too.

"This is definitely going in the behind the scenes." Jeff cried, still laughing. I noticed that the camera was still filming the crew laughing at me so I joined in again.