Beating For Two

Chapter 38

Sunday, May 9th

It wasn't until I woke up the next morning that I got to feel the full effects of of having gone through surgery. I'd been a little preoccupied last night, what with staring at the baby for hour after hour, and the anesthesia hadn't worn completely off by the time I went back to sleep around one AM, hence eliminating a lot of the pain I'd have felt if it had.

What woke me up that morning were the sounds of hushed voices talking somewhere nearby, and something about it – God knows what – had me startle awake with a yelp of panic.

It was very much possible that I'd grown a little bit paranoid. Not that it was that much of a surprise really; there had been signs of it last night as well when a nurse had come to take the baby so that I could go to sleep and I'd responded by starting to wail and sob as if the world was ending, and choking out small, broken sentences about “you're gonna take him away from me, aren't you?”

“They're just taking him for the night so that you can get some sleep, babe,” Harry had said, “He's gonna be here tomorrow when you wake up, don't worry.”

“But why can't I hold him? I'm not tired,” I'd whined. It was a downright lie – I was feeling just about ready to faint with exertion –, but I'd only had the baby for a couple of of hours and I wasn't ready to hand him over to someone else just yet.

“Yes, you are,” Harry'd said with a wry smile, “You can spend more time with him tomorrow, but right now you need to get some sleep.”

He won eventually, of course, with the help of Dr. Hayes and a nurse, and as soon as they'd taken the baby and left the room, I was off on the crying-train again, and Harry sighed. “Oh, Lou,” he said, sounding a little exasperated, as he put his arms around me and pulled me close to himself, “he's gonna be just down the hall, no one's taking him from you, I promise.”

When I now woke up, though, and heard the hushed, somewhat worried-sounding voices, I couldn't help but think that someone had come and taken the baby after all. The adoption-agency people most likely. Oh God, what if they'd come to get him without even telling me?

I opened my eyes, and caught sight of Harry and Anne standing by the foot end of the bed. “Where is he?” I asked hoarsely, my voice tired and strained. They both whipped their heads around immediately, and Anne's face lit up in a smile.

“How are you feeling?” she asked as she stepped around the bed and walked over to the side of it. “Sore, I imagine.”

I blinked. “No, not... really,” I said hesitantly.

“Try moving a little,” she said with a knowing expression.

I was somewhat confused as to what she was on about, but did as she told me to and shifted around a little and- oh. I groaned in discomfort because, okay, yes, I was indeed feeling quite sore in my lower stomach. How I could have completely forgotten about that part of all of this last night was something of a mystery to me, though not one that I chose to dwell on.

“It'll get better soon,” she said comfortingly, “the doctor said that the pain should start turning into numbness in about a week or so.”

Numbness? I frowned. That didn't sound good. I had more urgent problems to think about, though. “Where's the baby?” I asked, looking first at Anne and then at Harry, whose expression went form casual to ecstatic in one second.

“It's good that you woke up now, actually,” he said, “because it's feeding-time soon, and now you can do it.”

The relief I felt over the fact that no one had come and taken him during the night was almost overwhelming, and I closed my eyes for a second and drew in a deep breath.