The Werewolf Stalker

9: She's Stubborn and Kinda Stupid

By the time I got home, my entire household was buzzing. The moment Mother saw me come in the door, she rushed forward but Dad grabbed her elbow and held her fast. I disappeared into my room, flopped onto my bed, and slid the curtains shut. With my arms limp at my sides, I stared up at the underside of the bed.

Of course; now that I was giving the tears permission to fall they wouldn't come. I heard the loud, galumphing feet of either Astro or Valerian meander into the room, then promptly exit. There was nothing I hated more than just laying around and wallowing in a pool of my own emotions, but at this point I felt that it was unavoidable. For the past few weeks I'd simply been trying to survive past the incident, constructing a dam to hold back all the guilt, and now the feelings were flooding through.

Each moment of the kill; I could remember every one vividly. I could remember the pup's faces when their mother wouldn't wake up. I could remember the frozen look of shock on her face. I could remember the trickles of cold fear and guilt that had immediately invaded my veins like some heat-sucking parasite.

The air around my face was suddenly difficult to breathe.

"Redna, can I cuddle with you?" I looked over to find Celosia peeking beneath the curtain of my bed.

"Yeah, sure," I obliged, my voice weak. "C'mere."

She crawled up, her orange-gold curls bouncing, until she found the nook beneath my arm and rested her head on my breasts. My arm folded around her as she sapped body heat from me. She wasn't like a leech; more like an icepack taking away all the uncomfortably warm sadness.

"I thought you weren't coming back so I felt sad," she muttered, not looking up at me.

"I always come back, promise," I told her immediately, rubbing my thumb up and down her arm.

"I heard Valerian talking..."

"You're always eavesdropping," I tried to chastise, but my voice was a wisp.

"He said that you killed somebody," she whimpered, one of her fists grasping my shirt. "You wouldn't do that, would you Redna?"

"Not on purpose."

"So... you... y-you did?"

"I did," I whispered. "I never want to ever again."

"Please don't do that," she said, her voice cracking as tears I couldn't see dripped down her face. My own eyes were growing hot and blurry too. "I d-don't care that it's a werewolf... I-I j-j-just... I don't want my older s-sister... I d-don't want her doing that ever."

"Don't worry, I feel really bad about it."

"Promise you'll never do it again."

"I promise."

"P-pinky promise?"

I raise my pinky to hers and linked it, "Promise."

~

My messy hair was tied up into a bun as I stood at the kitchen table helping Maylie with her homework. Usually, Nodin would help the other less-than-capable quadruplets, but he was on a playdate with Pastel. I sighed, checking off the problems as the young girl watched me scribble over her freshly done work.

"We need to give the Atwoods a gift – Lena and Pastel are so nice to bring all of your schoolwork to and from the teachers..." Mom said, fluttering around the kitchen in order to cook lunch. Usually lunch was provided by the school – it was meager, but enough – and was one less thing for her to worry about when she rationed out our food for the month. "What do you think would suffice?"