Suicidal

I'll keep fighting.

As soon as everyone leaves.
My thoughts start.
I'm fighting them again. Hoping they'll come back to me and be with me again. I doubt my own existence but I want to make them happy. Well that's what I believe. I want everyone happy.
Yet I can't keep myself happy.
I lost so many people that I'm pushing everyone away. Except for one person I love. I don't ever want to lose them.
I'll keep fighting to keep them happy.
I won't leave them.
Yet I still feel useless.
I'm not suicidal. I'm just me. With no happiness at the moment and hard times right now but I'll keep standing and be fighting and keep being strong. I lasted so long here what's the point of giving up now? I just miss them so much.
I'll keep fighting.