What he gets you for Christmas

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Andre Silva
A framed picture of your dog

Granit Xhaka
A mariachi band to follow you for a day

Dele Alli
Tickets to a monster truck show

Ricardo Kaka
A romantic getaway to Kentucky

Mateo Kovacic
A wig

Mario Gotze
Dildo

Joshua Kimmich
A cardboard cutout of himself

Tito Villalba
Crocs

Miralem Pjanic
Your favorite gum

Ricardo Quaresma
Prescription pain killers ;)

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