Skeletons in the closet

Part 4 : Vulnerable

I don't even know when I became so vulnerable to such simple things that I'm suppose to be use to and take in stride. Whenever you ignore, me even though I'm suppose to be use to it because you have your own life and are completely overtaken by work sometimes, you have a way of making my heart hurt and I struggle to find a way to stop it. I don't know if you're giving me a sign telling me to leave you alone or what? Because one minute you'll say you miss me the next you'll ignore me even though I sent a simple text saying, "Good morning".

Hell, sometimes I wonder if you even meant it when you said you're in love with me or was that just a phase? I hate that I'm being insecure which leads to me second guessing everything you did because of your actions and mixed messages.

I feel like I'm slowly being torn at the seams...

I don't know if you actually believed me when I told you I'm in love with you. And I'm scared that you are the one person who can break me because these feelings I have for you are real they aren't made up because you confessed first... and I miss you so much I can't even comprehend the pain in my chest whenever I'm unable to talk to you.

Looks like things definitely took a turn for the worst. I thought we would be able to talk things out and figure out where we stand but instead you tore my heart out by saying we can't be together because you found someone else. And then you still asked me if we could still be friends because it would mean so much to you.

How can I be friends with you if seeing you with someone else is like having a knife stab me repeatedly in the chest. But because I can't bring myself to hate you and one of my instincts seem to be that I have to protect and care for you, I gave into your request because all I want is to see you happy even though I'm hurting on the inside...

Though I must say even when we were sort of together I always had a grain of doubt in me that you were just doing all this because you pitied me. And now after all that has happened I can't even tell if my feelings was reciprocated or if it was one  sided this whole time. I never thought this would happen. And to think we planned our future out and spoke about children. Now when I think back on it I just feel pathetic for believing I could ever have something like that with you, cause I feel like I was dragging you down and stopping you from doing the things you wanted, without meaning to, because I wasn't the type of person who enjoyed going to parties or being surrounded by a lot of people.

I can't help but regret that I gave you my heart only to have it crushed and thrown away in the end...

Though I'll be able to get over you somehow even though I will remember the memories we made together even after they turned bittersweet and made me think of what could've been...

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A/N:
I know its been a really long time but I've finally posted part 4 of Skeletons in the Closet.
Please read,review,comment if you want.
And pm me if you have any ideas on improving this story