It's only a short story, just sharing what I experienced last summer. My first ballet traning, the first opportunity I get in one of my biggest dream. To be a professional dancer, even I'm now on college and taking a non-dance major but still hoping that someday I will be the person that I wanted to be.
SORRY, I'M NOT A GOOD WRITER Ü
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Wake up at 5:00 o’clock in the morning, eat my breakfast and prepare my stuffs before I go to my one hour travel going to the most wonderful place I’ve ever been during my 2011 summer is the most tiring but one of the most unbelievable experience I had in my life.
It’s been almost three years since I started having a deep interest in Dancing, the summer after I graduated in high school and before I go into college. Watching DVD set of dance movies, video clips from YouTube and reading book about dancing became my most interesting hobby that time. Unconsciously, I was obsessed in dancing!
I never thought of entering a dance school, and take up dance classes that time because I know it’s expensive and mostly, my parents won’t let me. So I continue what I’m doing, and learn it at home instead. I started watching instructional videos that became my first teacher in learning dance and find it very effective. By only watching videos, other people would think that it’s impossible for someone to learn Ballet that fast.
Ballet takes so much determination, patience and years of training. Even most of people saying that this field belongs only to rich people, there are also instances that great and good ballet dancers belong to those determined and passionate people. So it means, no matter how unfortunate you are, as long as you’re doing your best to reach your goals and dreams there are many ways for you to take in achieving it.
I never stop doing what I started, those DVDs, videos and books never gone out on my to-do list everyday. Until one day, that days before the summer vacation last 2011 when I was searching for some dance schools here in the Philippines on the internet, I just clicked the Ballet Philippines official website. I just found out that there will be an audition for scholarship, those who could take dance classes for the whole summer for free. I don’t know but the feeling is different after I discover the audition, because at the first place taking a formal dance class never crosses my mind and even if it is, having courage? Never!!
That day after, I am having a hard time thinking of all the possible things might happen, negative or positive if I am going to let the opportunity go. Maybe negative because if I am in dance classes for the whole summer, my fare, food and everything would going to be my problem and also my responsibilities at home. But on the other hand, if ever I win the scholarship, it’s an honor because Ballet Philippines is one of the finest dance companies in the country and they only pick students who have a real talent and passion in dancing from the different areas of the Philippines.
For some reason, I printed out the application form attached to the website. Maybe for me to make my decision easily, that if ever I want to go I’ll fill it up and if not, I’ll get rid of it anyway.
Until the week before the audition came, it feels more intense like I was going to be on a hot seat. I really try to balance everything, because for me it’s not just some classes you took for no reason. It’s a dream, a really big part of my dream and my life.
I tried to talk to my friends first, ask their opinions and suggestions just for me to make my decisions not so hard. I don’t ask them if its right for me to go because I know to myself what was really right for me. Maybe I just need their supports morally so I could have the courage I needed for this kind of situation, and that was what they gave me.
The next step is to talk to my parents. My parents aren’t that vocal sometimes. Even they don’t say it verbally, I know that times when they really show their supports in everything that I am doing. It’s like days before the audition when I decided to tell to them that I want to go. And that time, negative words came first saying that it’s not school related, that I couldn’t benefit on it someday, and I’ll waste so much money, time and effort taking classes for the whole summer instead of staying at home and do my responsibilities. I can’t explain but I feel that It’s not so right to think that way, and I believe that those reasons weren’t meant by my parents, because after that, they gave me a chance to explain everything ending up in letting me do it because they can feel that I really want it.
Until the audition day came, and the feeling is so indescribable. Finally got in the audition place (at the Cultural Center of the Philippine), and I was worried because I was late on the audition time for those on level below the Intermediate and Advance students, so I was assigned to audition together with those students trained for years. The excitement, intensity and the thousand of butterflies in my stomach didn’t stop until we get inside in a huge mirrored room surrounded by Ballet Barres and a group of teachers that would judge everyone. Everything is not new to me since I learned some at home, but being with those people who I only meet on the videos is quite impossible to explain.
The intense feeling before the audition didn’t end until I found out that I got the scholarship, that I am one of the luckiest student to attend the summer dance Intensive classes in one of the finest ballet company in the country. Thinking that it’s so impossible to imagine the fact that I had now the opportunity to experience be in the world that I was just dreaming before, like all the hard work and determination worth it. That the next days, I‘ll wake up 5:00 o’clock every morning, prepare my ballet shoes, tights, shirts and my other stuff after eating my breakfast for my one hour travel going to CCP Pasay City and take my first ever ballet class that I was dreaming for.
The summer was also ended, after almost two months of classes aside from learning French words in ballet terms like “glisad jete Pas de bourre”, learn more techniques from real dance teachers not YouTube anymore, but mostly I learn to have a courage in making decision in every single thing that I do. The confidence I had when I prove to people that no matter how impossible they think my dreams would be, I never lose my hope. I learn to stand at my own feet when it comes to my dreams, I don’t let other people dictate me because I am old enough to know what was right and wrong for me. I learn that no matter how impossible your dreams would be, unless you are not into giving up all the possible ways would show on you and let you do your best as it make the impossible possible. God never gave use challenges that we can’t accomplish. I also learn how balance the two difference sides in making my decisions, because no one wants to regret at the end.
And now, my last summer still the most unforgettable summer I ever had in my life. The sweat and blood every class for almost everyday, the body pain, my ballet friends, those Teachers who corrected me on every mistakes and who notice my ability and talent will always be such a great memory that will be so impossible to forget.
Everything for me is just a start. The hardwork is still not enough, I know there will be more challenges to come. And as I learn from my start, I will going to be more though is facing all the obstacles in reaching all my dreams. I will never let the opportunities go away and regret everything. And mostly, I will never forget that God will always be there no matter what happen, the faith on him will always light up the darkest part of our life.
Now, all I just have to do is to live my life to the fullest, learn more from everything that I have done, continue dreaming until the day that I’m fulfilled with my life, give other people inspirations while I’m still not on the top of all the goals and dreams I have. I will just imagine that life is like an audition, you have to feel both excitement and intense in every challenges, never quit because it’ll be harder to regret, face the reality and conquer your fears because when you pass the audition, you will be surprise that all the dreams that you’re only dreaming before might make impossible to absolutely possible.
