Drunk New Yorker

Chapter 6

"Jade, I swear to God if you don't hide your Gerard Wade shrine, I will burn it down with your own candles!" I shouted as I unlocked the door.

"How dare you threaten my Gi-Gi!" Jade shouted, with an offended look on her face.

"Don't test me, I will burn it down," I say, Jade grumbled in agreement and carefully takes down her photos. I exit the apartment and I scowl when I hear our neighbors next to us screaming in Polish, the walls aren't thick and they never stop arguing, not even around their daughter, I presume. I put my one earbud in and attempt to ignore them, with some degree of success.

I walked down the stairs, and avoided looking at the man with an outline of a gun in his waistband, who was loitering around the stairwell.

I wasn't far from the Starbucks where I was meeting my Mom. Since I'm pretty sure my mom would end up in Queens if I just told her where I lived, I was going to walk my mom to the apartment.

The walk was uneventful, other than the guy trying to convert me into Lisardiasm, and in no time I was standing in front of the Starbucks.

I pushed open the door and the place was so crowded I had to look around a bit to find my mom. Finally I saw her, glaring at the hipster sitting next to her. I really couldn't blame her, though, that man's beard was twice the size of his face and as dirty as his feet.

"Ciao, Momma!" I said waving, she picked up her purse off the seat in order to let me sit down. I saw that she had a cup of coffee.

"Ciao, Renata," she said, taking a sip of coffee. "Questo caffè è terribile." Even though she was complaining about the coffee, she took another sip.

"How's Eleonora?" I asked my mom. Currently my mom and dad were staying with my oldest sister, Eleonora and her family.

"Bene," she said "Angelo, he is good in school."

"That's good, Eleonora would probably have his ass- I mean he, would umm, he would be in trouble," I said, trying to cover up my cussing. My mom didn't seem to have noticed though.

"He is learning French in school," My mom said with admiration

I was a bit surprised to learn that, he already knew Italian and English, which is already impressive for a 12 year old. But knowing how smart my nephew is, I wouldn't be surprised if he was fluent in French as well by his senior year.

My mom finished up her coffee and we began to walk to my apartment, talking in Italian the whole way there. I caught up on what Eleonora and her family were up to and my mom asked questions about New York.

"Quindi perché sei passato?" My mom asked me. So you moved?

"Sì," I said, putting my hands into my pockets, I had a habit of fidgeting with my bracelets when I lie. "My next door neighbors were very loud," I said, lying, "And my new apartment is even closer to my work," another lie. But if my mom knew I'd been evicted she would insist I come live with Eleonora and them in the suburbs of New Jersey. Fortunately I am very stubborn person, and that would not be happening anytime soon.

"Siamo qui!" I said, once we arrived to the apartment building. My mother looked around, and apparently she wasn't impressed by the cracked bricks and broken windows.

"In che piano vi trovate?" My mom asked, looking at the tall building.

"We're on floor 6," I replied.

It took me longer then normal to get to my apartment because my mom's legs weren't that strong anymore. When we got to the apartment my neighbors were still screaming at each other.

"Go in Momma, I'll be in in a minute." I said, smiling while glaring at my neighbor's door.

My mother nodded and walked in and I turned towards the thunderous noise coming from behind the door.

"Oi, you idiots! Get out here!"

The screaming stopped and I heard feet stomping towards the door, with the door finally opening to reveal a blonde haired man and his brunette wife. "What?!" He screamed in a heavy Polish accent.

"Can you please, for the love of the Devil, shut the fuck up." I said, glaring at him.

"Ty kurow," the man said, trying to close the door on me.

"Don't call me a bitch," I said putting my foot in front of the door. He scowled at me but I simply smiled at him. "That's right you, skurwielu, I looked up Polish cuss words."

The man didn't respond and instead kept slammed the door on me, the couple wasn't fighting anymore, or maybe they were just passive aggressively staring at each other, either way they were being quite now.

I whistled happily and began to shimmy open the door. What I saw next made me wish I had stayed and argued more with the Polish neighbors.

"What the motherfucking hell, Jade!"

The scene before me was terrifying. Jade was handcuffed to the mini fridge handle, and because it was so much smaller than her she was sitting cross legged next to it. Jessie appeared to be trying to be trying to break the handcuffs with a butcher knife, and my mother was staring silently at the scene before her.

"I can explain," Jade said.

"Well than you better get to it, Jade." I said, using all of my sanity not to strangle her.

---

I'm sorry that I am absoutley horrible with deadlines. I promise that I will not give up on this. Girl Scout's Honor.