The Dollhouse

Chapter 35

STRANGER and stranger!

After that night, I wasn't sure how to feel. When the gang piled back into the car after a bummer night, Nick and I remained quiet. In the darkness of the car, I kept running my hands over my lips, admiring how soft they felt.

Hence why I was thrilled when Nick asked me out the following weekend.

But it didn't go as planned.

When Father Edgar, my sister and stepmother asked me where I was going, I told them the truth; I was going for lunch with a friend. But nobody knew that the appointment had rendered me sleepless at night, tossing and turning. Replaying the moment in my head like a reel of film.

We didn't meet at the diner. Instead, some quiet coffeehouse that charged higher than it's marker price, with greenery hanging down artistically from the gutters. Nick was already there, a steaming black coffee by a stack of napkins.

He tried to resist a double-take. "Hey."

"Hi," I said. I tried to make it seem that I hadn't put any extra effort into my appearance, but somehow a canary yellow blouse had jumped out. I had memorized walls of the same shade.

"Do you want to look at the menu?"

God, how had I not appreciated him before? Nick wasn't the typical figure of beauty, but he did possess qualities that were attractive. I liked gleam of his chestnut hair, which was combed back neater than normal. I'd only seen it so tidy on the occasion that Sam and I went to dinner with his family. And his eyes. They were always so kind.

Chill, I told myself. It's just Nick.

The two of us. Here, alone.

In normal circumstances, silence wouldn't have bothered me when we were together. I picked a sparkling water and a bagel, wondering if his heart was fluttering in his chest, too. The simplicity of it was so cliche - two teenage kids, sitting in a cafe wondering where to start.

"I'm sorry if I made things weird," Nick said. He seemed unable to look me in the eye when he spoke the words. "If you don't want - I completely understand -"

I cut him off. "I like you."

Is this how Violet felt? Shaking, empowered, a huge sensation of relief when the same look was reflected back like a mirror? It was like the last few months had fallen into place. Nick had a crush on me. Nick, who had been sweet from the beginning. Who no doubt confided in Betsy, who gave him advice while I was bear-spotting in the woods.

"I guess I just, never thought about it until..."

Every syllable had a life of its own.

"So what do we like, do?" he said quietly.

Nick's tone was so worried, it made me laugh.

I didn't even care that there was bread between my teeth. The side of his hand made contact with my own across the table, and I didn't shift away. The skin felt warm to the touch. Ripping my gaze away from the bubbles fizzing in my glass, I tried to look at him. He was as shy as I was, hesitant, like we were nursing a baby bird with a broken wing.

It was then, the day morphed into one that nobody could foresee.

"Hey, guys," a voice said.

Even before he slid into the seat on Nick's side of the table, I knew the smooth arrogance of his voice. A voice the ears dreaded.

Not here. Not now.