.:. Chapter Four .:.

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ASHTON'S POV

It just laid there intimating me. It's been over a week since I have found someone's journal; it's been over a week that it's been haunting me telling me to read what's inside. But for some reason I felt the need to leave it aside. It wasn't mine; yet it felt so right.

From the moment I walked out my door all I could here were our family. Our 5sosfam that is. They are incredible people who believe in us. We wouldn't have gotten this far without them. They have made mine, Luke's, Michael's, and Calum's dream come true; and everyday it gets better! Without them we would probably still be in that garage.

Their screams filled my ears. They are my music and I could listen to their perfect harmony all day.

"ASHTON! ASHTON!! CAN I GET A HUG?! ASHTON CAN YOU TAKE A PICTURE WITH ME?!" They all were jumping up and down with so much excitement I'm surprised none of them had fainted yet. That's happened you know. I looked over at a girl one time her face lite up and the she fell down. Later on I found out she fainted. I felt so bad, but for us guys to have that effect on girls was unbelievable!

Dear Diary,

It's only gotten worse. Just like I had thought, but never wanted to believe. It's been a year since I have found out, and everyday gets me deeper in an emotional hole. I don't understand how others deal with it. My mind is no longer ever blank. My brain scatters everything. I can't go a day without thinking about it. I go day after day thinking of the same thing. Worrying my mind of stuff I shouldn't be thinking about at the age of sixteen. But that's life and life can be cruel. Sometimes I wish I was the wrong answer and someone would just erase me away.

"Hey man have you seen my guitar pick?" Michael asked me and I shook my head no. I haven't been really paying attention to anything lately; my mind was only set on what I had read of the journal. Who was this person talking about? Girl or boy? Did they hurt someone? Why would they write 'Sometimes I wish I was the wrong answer and someone would just erase me away'? Did they really think that? Why would they think that? What did they do so wrong that they thought that?

My mind was filled with questions and I couldn't push them aside this time...

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