Us Against The World (Liangelo ball fanfic)

Depression

Chanel's pov

I walked in the halls of UCLA. I briefly met eye contact with lonzo. I looked away as I put my stuff in my locker and bent down to fix the tongue of my vans. I got up feeling an unfamiliar feeling of hatred towards LiAngelo. I was diagnosed with depression just a few weeks after he broke up with me. Something that dragged me on everyday.  I blamed myself. I thought I was to ugly or my thighs were to thick. But at the end of the day I wasn't the only one to change.

LiAngelo was no longer the quiet and shy one I fell for. He was loud like Melo now and not even the least bit reserved like Zo. Everyday I see him walk with his new cliche making me want to scream his name out and put him on the spot for leaving me in the dust when things got hard. See this is why my life is how it is. When I get close to people they simply just leave then times get tough.

I watch as liangelo held Hehleena's hand. I thought back to the time when we exchanged I love you's to one another. The word sounding more foreign than common in my mouth. I watched as his hands slid around her waist. The hands that use to touch me in a similar way. I decided to look away. Another day of suffrage. Another day of him walking past me as if I was nothing more than a mere shadow. The feeling of him being with someone else breaking my very soul.

But I kept going. Through it all, I kept going.
I walked into this program the teacher decided to put me into.

I talked with kids who faced depression just like me. The same kids who watched me dance just a few days ago. I was nervous, the could be a tough crowd. Especially since I was only a few years older than them. Me being 18 and the kid again from 13 to 15.

I fixed my shirt and walked into the library where unfamiliar faces met mine. "Now children this is Ms.Santiago she will share her story with you, pleas even respectful" Ms.Morgan said.

"She is a baddie" a boy frommthe far corner yelled out. I laughed and came to the center of the room. "Hey guys. I'm chanel Santiago. Call me chanel. I'm currently 18 and attending this very college. I won't bore you to death because that's far from what I'm going to do. I'm a danc-

"Pathetic! I bet you don't suffer from depression" a girl with tight cornrows on and a tank top and and black joggers. "If I was to tell you what I've gone through or what goes through my head every night I lay my head down on a pillow, I'll have you crying in 2.5 seconds girl, so listen up you might learn something".

I chorus of ouu's filled the room as the girl slouched in her chair.
I read her name tag, her name was Liselle.

"Ok now I am dancer. I could've been anything I wanted to be, I shouldn't even be going to college. You see, my parents had my whole life planned out for me. Can you imagine having no say in your future?. It as always chanel your doing this , chanel your doing that. It gets tiring at some times, belive me I wished bad for my parents alot. They were ignorant and of course my mother a little stuck up cactus. My dad was my Savior. He understood me, yet he still sided with my mother".

I paused to look at the faces, the were intrigued waiting for the next word to fly out my mouth so I continued. "I fell in love recently. I loved him so much it hurts. We did everthinf together and he was the sweetness. Sometimes I blame myself but I blame my parents most of all". Then I told them the story of that night the dinner happened.

"Wait so your mom is racist" the boy who had called my a baddie earlier said. "You can say that"

"But I knew she wouldn't like him yet I still went out with him, I still kissed him. Because I loved him. Then he broke up with me. I was dumb to think anyone would stay with me. So I'm back on my grind but I still can't get him off of my mind..."

I said whispering the last part. "Well children ms.santiago has to go but my questions,".

I girl with long black hair  falling over her eyes a bit sitting in the back by herself raised her hand nervously. I swore I saw myself in her. "Yes sweetie don't be shy" I said. "My name is um raven and I just wanted to know how you cope with all this happening in your life?"

"Good question. How do I cope with this? Well I just accept that this is my life and I think ahead instead of behind. I keep my mind set that things will get better and from there I move on".

She nodded brushing her hair back. "Anymore" I said. The kids shook their head. I nodded, "I guess I'll see you all next week Tuesday right ms.Morgan"

She nodded. I waved bye as I opened the door my body colliding with liangelo's. "I um..." He began to say.

"Move your in my way" i said bluntly. "Can we talk please chane, please." He whispered holding on to my arm. "Liangelo we have nothing to talk about other than the fact that you left me when things were getting tough for us." I spat.

"Im scared.." he mumbled. "Huh?"

"IM SCARED OKAY! I'm scared that the way I feel about you will bring you down like your family Clearly said".

"Liangelo. YOUR TELLING ME YOUR BROKE UP WITH ME BECAUSE YOU ARE SCARED OF YOUR FEELINGS? HUH YOU DONT THINK I WASNT SCARED  WHEN I WAS ON MY OWN ON THE STREETS AT 16. YOU DONT THINK I WAS SCARED WHEN MY OWN MOTHER DIDNT EVEN WANT ME. you didn't think I was scared when I got diagnosed with depression... Liangelo I loved you with all my heart.! I did but you just played me for some sick bitch. DO YOU HEAR ME?!! I loved you! I thought you were different I wanted to change my world so you could fit right in it...
I loved you..." I said tears streaming down my face as I walked the other way. Not caring that people stared and not caring that liangelo was calling my name.

I just wanted to be alone...