Grey

Chapter 10

Something is wrong with his brother and Castiel is changed.

He's still Castiel, of that Dean has no doubt. But he's distant and evasive in a way that goes beyond his customary alien angelness.

A vampire infects Dean and neither his brother nor Cas intervene. He's cured in the end, but it's plain to Dean that Sam is not just changed or traumatised by Hell, he's wrong.

He loses Lisa.

His grandfather is in league with the King of Hell.

Sam has no soul.

Castiel is at war and prayers go unanswered.

Things continue to spiral out of control until Sam tries to murder Bobby and Dean realises something has to be done.

In his desperation Dean calls upon Death himself.

Death is a cryptic son of a bitch, and Dean gets the feeling he's a moment away from being squashed like a bug, but some shitty deep fried food and a bit of ass kissing and he comes through in the end.

It's all a bit preachy, the stuff about souls and balance but Sam is Sam again.

Things are bleak, but Dean takes comfort in having his brother back. He's done something right, fixed one wrong at least.

Castiel fights his war in heaven and Dean feels like a dog begging for scraps, whining for attention.

He knows the angel is hiding something though. Castiel may not want Dean for a mate, but that doesn't change the fact that Dean's body considers him his alpha. He is an open book to Dean. His scent, his posture, every tiny expression that flits across his face - Dean is fluent in Castiel. And he can read the lies and fear that cling to his estranged mate.

Even Bobby and Sam grow suspicious.

Dean doesn't want to believe it, defends him, but Castiel goes and digs his own grave and proves it himself. He's been eavesdropping. Listening in on them.

He insists they let him explain himself and even though he can tell Sam and Bobby are just humoring him, they agree. He wants to be wrong, he wants Cas to have been keeping an eye on them, not spying on them. Wants some reasonable explanation. He's an angel, maybe he honestly thought listening in on conversations was totally A-Okay. They trap him in holy fire and -

"It's hard to understand," Castiel tells them. "It's hard to explain. Just let me go. Let me out and I can-"

Dean can already tell he's lying, can smell it on him, but he's desperate. "You got to look at me, man," he pleads. "You gotta level with me and tell me what's going on. Look me in the eye and tell me you're not working with Crowley." Dean tries to hold those blue eyes, but Cas can't. Looks down at the floor.

There's a lump in Dean's throat. He swallows. There's no deluding himself anymore. Cas has been working with a demon behind their backs. For months. Dean wonders how much of the Eve thing Cas knew about. He'd poisoned his own freaking blood and let her bite him. Had Cas let her out on purpose? And that whole thing with Crowley's bones - a trick?

He feels stupid.

So fucking stupid.

It's been staring him in the face, but he'd thought – he'd so sure Cas wouldn't do that. Whatever else there was between them, they were meant to be friends. Share a profound bond. He was meant to be able to trust him. For an awful moment Dean thinks he might cry. He can feel Sam and Bobby looking at him. Pitying him. And they don't even know the half of it. "You son of a bitch."