The secret life of me and some advice

The break up

3/19/14-break from M please just read that is the last thing from me

let me just tell you somethings about him i always liked him i just didn't know how to tell me he can tell lies about be but there not making a broken heart cry the happiness i said it was a lie i just didn't want to look like i was wombed if i had to describe him he is the perfect person he is funny he is my everything but i just don't know now he is with someone now he turned so many people against me as if i didn't have a hard time as it is i don't like henry and i never will go ahead tell my secrets to everyone i will simply turn the other cheek you can have your vote team Matthew or Team Jizelle i can care less but when thousands are against you there was one i hope was with me if i didn't like you anymore i would have told you things i don't tell anyone not even my best friend but i trusted you would someone that liked you stay up 3-4 in the morning talking to you I'm sorry i cant answer text messages but there has to be a time when i have to focus on school go ahead say I'm lying but would i lie to the person i love but now that you hurt me so badly i have no more feeling to love its just harder for me to take something like this i always new this would happen just not now i hope you enjoy your life single because you can go with Nicole or any one i don't care but i did but i have a feeling some girls might not want a heart breaker if there was a way to show how much i care i would but now.. but i guess we are over you don't need me no one does i feel like I'm going to kill myself for being so stupid remember what we talked about when i said if this ever happened you said nothing would change we would still be friends and we wouldn't let that many people know now everyone hates me some people that trusted me i know you were not the one that started but you could had said stop you broke your promise have a nice life and i heard what you did to the things i gave you at lease i cared enough to keep your things and if you really like me you would now are real date was 6-7-13 i new all along everything big that happened to use i wrote it in my journal the truth is that we didn't understand each other i hope you have someone that you love as for me I'm going to be alone enjoy your votes not like you never enjoyed the moments with you and the only reason i had to talk to henry was because henry and adriana go in a fight i know you hate me to much to read this but this is the truth

It all stated with a school day fifth grade to kids with on secret that are the same they both know that they are perfect for each other. We all make are own decisions but what if those decisions change everything. It was a chance for romance. But it stung like a bee it really hurt. But what if your heart could speak what would it say. Mine would say there was only one person that understands me better then the rest but takes me as a child. Are you scared of your own words or even your shadow because you know it can take you to the dark. But your heart can say other wise. Are hearts are like candles they a bright and they show the way to safety. But when blowed out its darker then night so cold no feeling in sight. But at the moment when the love of are life's takes us away there is always light in the heart never dark. I might be young but your never to young to say I'm in love sure we don't know what it means but it change a lot in a persons life. If your feeling could speak what would they say. To me they would say stay strong you are not weak people will see you like that but does that make that true strength is not I'm how great but how great the heart inside if you is. Have you ever heard that saying when you love something set it free if it comes back to you it was yours to keep. I really never thought about that till now hoping one day he will forgive a heart that needs healing you a mouth that can't stop saying lies. If the love of my life would listen would he could he should but won't no matter how big the distance no matter how many things in my ways I want to tell him I never like that boy that I just liked him. I don't want him back I just want him to know the truth that all the lies a simple boy make there not true unless you want that. You say your waiting for the right girl but you had her. You promised if this ever happened you would show me sympathy, mercy, forgiveness, and most of all truth. The truth lies inside of me but will not be heard so her me now or never again but all I want is for him to know the truth. I stay in my own world a world where I am happy because you are happy this might just seem like white lies that is is a river of broken hearts where ares remain but know deep in my heart the truth will be told one day. What about next year what is going to happen? Will you pretend I'm not alive? Or but away are differences and look aside to all the happy, nice, kind memories that we both shared. I understand that we are done but I do not want that. I might seen like I do but to show you what you are losing for a mistake that was made not by me but by you. Letting a unwise one tell you lies a wizard that grants powers of thinking the wrong and doing no good. I see you in my dreams I see you in the clouds in see you in my songs that are about you and I see you in my heart a place that I wish you would stay but did you ever see me. Grant me one wish or two for love, faith, mercy, forgiveness, and the chance for you to listen. I hope you have a better life with a person you love and I hope you remember it was me the person you said you loved a long time ago for love is a strong word that can not be spoken through word for by the greatness of your heart.❤️

My heart tell no lie but only tells what's inside. The feel the truth the honesty the love. It was things that I thought I knew I still do but in a different way. I heard I listened I understand how you must be feeling but did you ever thought how I heard how I listened and how I understand. It's like a glass wall so clear easy to break yet can't get through. The more you think the more you say the more understand there is nothing in your way. Imagine 3 different roads the left is love like before the right is hatred like now and forgiveness a path I hope you take not just for me for everyone you may have hurt its path. Right you want to go many ways but one is the future and it's all in your control. I can care less what other people say and the more lies that are being made but as I said before I want you to know the truth. I never said I love you to anyone else but the one I truly love I never liked that boy you said I did. The ones that told you that do not have the truth and have something against me. We are like stop lights red for what we are now we have stopped we would be yellow take it slow and green no problems and nothing wrong. You are the wonder to my land you made me so different in all the good ways. I know at this point you don't want to read on but if you did read this tell me what you think if you believe its fine if you don't answer but I'm sorry Matthew for what you think and for me not talking to you just please read this and comment back. It fine if not read or anything at this point just...don't hate the world and be mad at other for my mistake. Just think one more time the great times we had the long talks we had are use to long text messages and the times under the stairs asking can you text can you FaceTime the times I told you all my secrets which was hard for me to do and some secrets I never told my best friends so secrets are hard to know but what about this I may or may not be over you. I feel like Taylor Swift writing songs about an ex but how can I not when all my songs stated from you my song book in the trash songs I sing to you or the new songs about all of this but nothing will change and about Instagram don't ops something on your bio that can make you or me or even both of use seem like the bad guy. My fine words of this story.

All I have to say is that love makes no promises for anyone. Making lies are easy in love trick a heart that has been sticked before. Well with a trick a broken heart and two star cross lovers and an enemy out for blood a victim. I officially don't necessary like the word love I don't know what it means and it's a game to some people. But I wormed myself not to get involved because most of the time love will start in the middle is hugs and kind word then it comes to a fight and ends with heart break. It's funny how some friends are they say I beet that person up but when that moments come some will do something but not all the time. Don't fall in love so easily and don't forgive someone that hurt you. What is someone had said something to and it's not true but that other person the lover thinks that? well when they realize that they were wrong they need to find a way to get you back. Unfotrantily you cant change the past. ask before you think thats a big part and a major rule. people are good at singing math or anything but you should never be good at breaking hearts. do so and you may make that person never love again. 10 years 10 months 10 weeks 10 days 10 hours 10 minutes 10 seconds you will always remember your first love i really don't want to for mine hurting me more than anyone. 10 months you think you would have some trust. listen to word listen is a great word it has a bigger definition then what you think. roses are red violets are blue but my heart cant be bluer then yours. i wold think we are the star cross lovers Romeo and Juliet both in love but have to hid their secrets. i may not be smart but i understand lots of things but i just don't understand love in the dictionary its a feel/emotion that shows endearment but its so much more then that. love a word i wish i don't get into instill i knows it someone i understand and most of all a person that understands me that so big but this time in love it didn't happen i said to myself if something happens to use a fight problem i am gone but this is the life of love a pain or a knife that can strike at you at any point

It's amazing how easy my mind falls for tricks an I hate that about my self I real don't know why I would hate my ed for such a stupid reason. I think I had almost the best day. Some one that I now like likes me a lot and he asked me for my number so to if he text I act as if my cousin come over all the time an say thing about me and him but he reads them but never answer then I act like I really go on and I say something like I get if you never want to text but he says nothing bit about M and me ya things are not going to good and what makes me laugh is that I think that max likes that we in a fight he is super funny and really nice to me my like M but what I do to the guys to low of they are going enough for me so I test them by saying they said something mean to me even thought they didn't I don't want a yes man I am very picky sorry