I want him. I want all of him, all the time. As of lately, he is all that I think about. I know I'm setting myself up for heartache but I feel like it's fine. I don't know how to go a day without thinking about him. He's so tall and sweet. He's got the sexiest smile and is super confident. He does not care what anyone else thinks, and he knows exactly what he wants. I wish it was me that he wanted.
Sure, we're a thing. Yeah he takes me to and from school to avoid my ex on the bus. Yes we kiss. Of course we hang out, and obviously we see each other before school, after school, and during lunch. It's just always as friends. Friends this, friends that. It's so hard to get him alone because he has so many friends... but when we are alone, ohhh boy.
I've never craved someone so much. Just talking to him makes my day. His kiss makes me melt, and when we're alone my dirty thoughts just get dirtier. They'll always just be thoughts, though. He's made it clear he isn't a sexual person and he isn't looking for a relationship. I have been trying so hard to change that relationship thing.. so I'm finally going to do it.
On November 13, 2017 I'm going to do it. During lunch I am going to ask him out. I've been learning Japanese for him (he speaks Japanese pretty fluently and I wanted to surprise him) and the poem I published, I'm going to read to him in Japanese. I'm also going to give him a painting of a Japanese Cherry Blossom I made...
I just hope I don't get rejected.
