Beyond My Reach ˚ ✞ . Andy Biersack

8

I stirred in my sleep, slowly awakening, my body was covered in a layer of sweat as beads inched down my forehead. I tossed and turned in the bed, I knew what my body wanted, my junk clock was running low. I stared out the window, the sun wasn't even up yet. Another hour I told my self clamping my eyes shut and gritted my teeth. I took shallow breaths and stared at the roof wiping the sweat off my forehead. It was becoming more painful sitting there. It let out a cry of pain when it felt like my bones were unclipping.

I couldn't do it. I couldn't make the hour.

I got up stumbling to the bathroom and slouched against the wall falling on my ass. I urgently looked through my stuff to cook up a shot. My hands shook as I brought the syringe to my vein and plunged it in. My head tilted back as I pushed down on it sending the life giving elixir through my veins bringing me relief. My body quivered in ecstasy. god it was such a beautiful feeling. It was like the warmest embrace you ever felt, it was like it was from.. god... or someone who loved me.

I had passed out after I pulled the needle out, but eventually I slowly brought my self back to reality. As I was rubbing my eyes realization hit, I couldn't go twelve hours with out junk. The highs weren't lasting long enough any more I needed it too frequently. I kicked the cabinet and gripped my hair in frustration. But that wasn't the only reason why, I had finished what I had and I'd have to get more.

"You screwed your self up Monica no one else," I said to my self, I got back up and collapsed on my bed for a few more hours. I woke up sometime near nine, I was supposed to go to a tattoo parlor today for a job interview at 10:30. I did the ordeal of showering, and brushing my teeth, still very upset with myself, and got dressed. I pulled on my Jeans and an okay shirt, and I added my leather jacket on top. My stomach growled, I didn't have any food really maybe a granola bar or two in my bag. I fished one out and ate it then pocketed the $20 in my bag.

I left and walked to the tattoo parlor, I hoped today wouldn't go sourly and that my lucky streak wouldn't abide.

And just as I felt lucky it went quickly. The interview went well and all but I didn't get the job. I panicked quite a bit about what I was gonna do for money, maybe live off of tips from playing guitar.

But that won't cover your addiction.

My stomach growled and it occurred to me that I'd have to choose tonight, between food or more junk. I hated my self the moment I realized where I had arrived, I had been walking aimlessly but really my body took the path to the club where all the drug dealers hang. I had subconsciously made my decision, even if there wasn't really one to make. I'd die without that shit, plain and simple. Fuck food.

I pushed through the crowd of drunken, horny men and women, their sweaty bodies every where were pushed against each other's, and almost all of them were slurring. My feet carried me to the familiar place at the back of the club. I quickly found the face I was looking for, squaring my shoulders to look more confident I walked up to him and lent against the wall.

"Monica how can I help you," he smirked. I loathed him but at the same time had to not since he supplies my addiction.

"you know what I want," I said, Miguel was your typical man you shouldn't be involved with. If you were you weren't up to any good.

"How much you've got?"

"A 20,"

"That won't even cover a week," he laughed

"I don't have any more money

"Well..." he trailed off a smirk on his face "how about this; keep your 20 I'll give you a week supply and throw in a bit of cash for a little... for my friend over there," he nodded his head. it was typical of him to trade off sex for drugs. he knew desperation.

He wasn't hideous, he was alright. he looked nervous even. "has he even had..."

"best part- 28, virgin, wants to lose it already, he's paying for your junk," miguel winked.

It didn't seem bad, somewhat pleasant, I get food and possibly a nice experience. "alright," I sighed.

~Beyond My Reach~

Disgusting Bitch

I scowled at my self as I walked back to the apartment. I had walked out the club feeling cheap and I still do. I stopped at the store to grab a few things to eat before I continued my walk.

I pushed open the door and dropped the bags on the kitchen counter. I placed the few perishable items in the fridge before heading to the bathroom. I peeled off my shirt and the rest of my clothing before continuing the pain of taking a shower. what i had done wasn't horrible, I just felt bad for doing it in general.

A knock on my door made me get out even though I hated being in the shower.

"I'm preoccupied give me a minute!" I shouted, I quickly patted my body dry and pulled on some clothes. My hair was barely dripping as I answered the door. There was a guy in the other end who definetly couldn't be older than me.

"Hi my Name's Sam I uh live down the hall and uh, you're new and don't hate my guts yet, so can you please, please help me get rid of a big ass spider," he begged.

Taken aback and surprised I just said "Oh, uh sure I guess." I wasn't expecting this whatsoever

I followed him to his apartment, there was a moderately large spider in his kitchen. I got a tissue and picked it up then threw it outside. We stood outside and talked.

"Thank you so much, my boyfriend's out and I'm scared to death of spiders."

oh? he was gay. He looked like Adam too, just he could hold a relationship.

"It's no problem," I said akwardly

"Oh, I didn't catch your name," he said

"Monica rose," I said rocking on my heals "so you live here with your boyfriend?" I asked

"Mhm, and our adopted daughter."

"Thats sweet," I smiled he seems pretty nice why would the people who live here hate him?

"Well, thanks again for getting rid of the nasty piece of crap so thanks, and I'm babbling aren't I?"

"Really, it's not a big deal," I chuckled

"Well I've gotta make dinner, have a good night Monica," Sam smiled I nodded and went back to the apartment. I saw a text on my phone.

RockStar: Have a good night Moni :)

I bit my lip, 'oh please it's barely bed time'

RockStar: for you maybe, for me it's been a long day.

Monica: I bet, what you working on.

RockStar: Just this movie

Monica: so he makes music and movies?

RockStar: Don't make me sound so abnormal. our professions have its perks.

he said professions. he thinks of me as a musician still.

Monica: well some professions more than other
It sounds like you're doing something great though.
I'd like to know more.

RockStar: I can tell you more next time I see you.

Monica: that sounds good.

Rockstar: 😴 good night

i closed my phone after the last text and turnt over in my small bed. our professions. pft.
>>>>>

A little filler chapter any one?

:P so this is pretty much Monica's life, pretty shitty,

Also can you guess why the neighbors don't like Sam and his boyfriend? ;)

Also sorry not much Andy in this chapter. And the lame finish,:/

Nov. 16 2022