When I awaken I'm greeted by a very very scared and freaked out Paul, It hurts to even slightly try to glance around. But its dark. I can barely make out his face, but I can smell the old blood laying around me and on me. I just lay on floor; unmoving.
"Beth." he says. Pulling me gently into his arms, normal humans would be calling 911. But yeah. "Beth." He repeats looking me over, gently touching the giant cut in my head, I wince. He stops. I listen closely as he calls Carlisle to hurry over but its all fuzzy, and my hearing is fading. Fast.
"Paul," I say his name but its so much work just to get out that on syllable. I shut my eyes tight trying to block out the pain, but only making it worse. He didn't hear me too caught up in the drama. "Paul." I say louder.
Silence. "Carlisle is on his way, what's wrong? Do you need anything?"
"No." he pulls me closer, kissing my forehead gently. His arms warm against my seems to be freezing skin.
"Your cold. Your loosing blood. Beth open your eyes and look at me please." So I open my eyes, but everything is still black. I don't even fully remember what happened. I fell. But how long I laid on the floor I don't know. But if I go by the aching pain in my back and stiffness, i'd say longer than a few hours.
Next thing I know Carlisle is here speed stabbing me with the needle to sew up my head. I just let the tears go, and wait for it to be over. Which it soon is. But my sight doesn't come back.
"Hey Beth, you've got some head trauma, and I stitched up your head. But you might have a concussion so I want you to stay awake and stay calm. You might go into a coma, so stay awake and we'll take you to the hospital."
I'm not entirely sure how sick of a hospital a person can get but by this point I am so sick of the hospital I could cry. I hate the smell I hate the sight I hate everything about the hospitals and the fact that Paul can barely visit. I miss him, I miss being me, I miss the normalcy of everyday life that I used to take for granted. I miss everything before I found out. Before I found out about…. Paul..
Its early, and its Wendesday. Ive been out of school for a week, and my attendance record is bad. Carlisle is running some tests but he won't tell me why or what. So he is keeping me here, like a prisoner, and he won't tell me. But Paul knows and Paul won't tell me ether. And that is what has me worried. Dad's worried too, but he won't even look at me. I don't even know what to think.
"Would you just tell me?" I asked Paul later that night. He just shook his head and pulled me closer, avoiding eye contact. But I can see in his face its not good. Nothing is good. And honestly I'm terrified. I always thought when Paul started keeping stuff from me it would be the end of the world. I guess I should start planning for the apocalypse.
"Paul." I say, more annoyed this time, he finally looks at me, and he looks broken. Utterly broken. Shattered. And I break along with him. "What? What is it?" I ask again and his eyes brim with tears.
"Carlisle said that the reason…" He takes a deep breath and I wipe his tears from his face. "The reason you fell, and blacked out. He said it was a tumor. You have a potentially cancerous tumor in your beautiful head." He brushes my hair and kisses my head. It takes a moment for it all to set in. I can't have cancer. I just can't.
"What are we going to do? What am I going to do? Paul..?" He's just staring at the wall not moving."Look at me!" I yell slightly louder.
"I don't know, ok? I don't know what were going to do or what your going to do. I don't know anything. All I know is that I don't want to think about the love of my life having cancer. I want to be able to grow old with you and have kids with you. And this. I just, I don't know." Im crying now, along with him. He just hugs me closer in his warm protective embrace. Possibly the only place where everything disappears. Where my fears are gone and everything is familiar. In his arms. Nothing changes in his arms.
"We're going to make it through this. I am going to make it through this, and so are you."
