Oliver Loves Carson | ✔️

chapter seventeen

Oliver wasn't sure what to think. He rarely did anymore.

He was .... with Carson. With. Were they dating? Was he allowed to say that? Or ... were they in that weird stage where they were more than friends but not dating yet? Oliver didn't know, so he just went along with it.

On the other hand, Kale was here. Here--alive, breathing, intact--with his self-satisfied smirk and superiority complex. Oliver couldn't stand it. He couldn't stand him. And then he saw Ellie's bright smile and it made him feel better. She would always make him feel better.

So, he wasn't really sure how to feel. There were moments, though, pockets of time where he felt truly happy. All of which were around Carson.

Carson. Beautiful, golden, hazel-eyed Carson. The Carson whose grin made time stop and whose words caused a warm feeling to sink deeper into Oliver's stomach. None of this was new though, because Oliver had always felt this way. Now, however, it was real. It wasn't something in his head--a pretty dream that remained just a dream. It was surreal--to have something he's always wanted. Someone he's always wanted.

And so Oliver found himself frequently dwelling on this fact--letting it linger in the back of his head and in his heart and in his veins. He was dwelling on it in class then, and when the bell rang it took him a moment to return back to reality. He quickly started packing up, ignoring the worry that hit him when he realized that he was going to fail this class soon.

He could worry about that later.

He heard footsteps and looked up, a smile crossing his face unknowingly.

Carson smiled back. "Idea," he stated.

"Curiosity," Oliver replied.

"Homecoming. You and I?" proposed Carson.

Oliver halted his movements for a second, trying not to let the emotion reach his face.

Homecoming. He felt his nose wrinkle just thinking about it. School events were never his thing. They seemed lame, fueled by bad music and the people who enjoyed it. He had been once in freshman year--Celia had refused to come--and all he had done was sit down and scroll through his phone the entire time, occasionally gazing at the people dancing in annoyance. He had never gone back though, and truthfully, he didn't want to.

But now, maybe he had a reason to go. Carson was asking him, and Oliver couldn't help but look at the giddy look on the other boy's face. Carson had gone to these events all the time with his friends, and enjoyed them. Oliver didn't want to disappoint him like that, and besides, this was the first couple-y thing they had ever done. If they were a couple, that is.

At Oliver's silence, Carson's face fell a little. "I mean, we don't have to. I-it was just a suggestion. It was a stupid suggestion anyway. I kind of have to go since I'm on the swim team, but if you don't want to-" he rambled.

"No!" Oliver blurted out, "I'll go. Sounds fun." He gave him a tight smile.

Carson pursed his lips. "I've told you that you're a bad liar, right?"

"Yeah," Oliver answered, "but I'm not lying this time. I want to go with you."

Carson peered at him unsurely. "Okay," he said, unconvinced, "if you say so."

***

There was a part of Oliver that dreaded this night. There was another part of Oliver that didn't want to dread it, because it would ruin everyone's mood. He couldn't stop the doubt from passing through his head.