Muted Words

We need to "talk"

Its incredible the impact a small phrase can leave you with such as

"I need to talk"

A phrase that holds so much hope, yet fear as well.
You can never be certain whats going on in someone else's mind.
Only what you assume or conclude.

When I hear that impacting phrase, it leaves me uneasy. I think to myself, will I be once more hurt? Will I'll be told words that I want to hear? Will I be heartbroken again?
Or simply will I once more fall into a downward spiral, like I usually do.

Its frustrating not having complete and utter control of everything.
I personally am a control freak, I need everything to be in place and perfect.

Perfectly knowing that it's impossible.
But is it so wrong to want the impossible.
We are continuously told to achieve the impossible. Through fiction, movies even music.
What is this ideal that we want to achieve? What do we get out of this?

You will never find a perfect friend, best friend, girl/boyfriend. It impossible, for none of is perfect. Yet we strive to find this perfection.

An illusion that society puts in us.
An illusion that God himself knows, mankind cannot achieve.

Once again, I hear that phrase, but slightly altered.

"We need to talk, tomorrow"

Although tomorrow is literally hours away. My stomach fills with butterflies wondering what it is you want talk about.
And not those butterflies that you feel when you see your lover.
No, those butterflies that eat you inside out. In which beg that you break.

And those are the scariest, beacause truth be told. Your gut is always right, and knows when to fear. Oh boy, do I fear right now.
Not for the brutal ending with a lover. But much worse.... A friend.

~~~Thano you again, for reading. As I've said before these are my thoughts. Perhaps they seem juvenile, and I apologize if so. But writing out my thoughts and emotions are what literally get me through life.... once again thank you for reading, and if you'd like to write something to add to my book I'm than happy to add on.~~~