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i didn't go to school today.
this is my fault.
she killed herself, it was my fault.
i didn't want to be friends with her, i wanted to be with her.
i didn't like her, i loved her.
i shrug it off, but after class i left a handkerchief on her desk.
she's so annoying, because i hate how she can't stand for herself. i hated seeing the person i lovedcrying.
i never liked hanging with her, i loved hanging out with her. but i couldn't. because knowing i got bullied more, if she hang out with me, the more she'd get bullied more too. i didn't want to see her hurt and bullied.
i guess she was too stupid to realize what i was trying to do.
but i myself was stupid too.
i wanted her to find someone better than me.
it's hard. hard to face the truth. that the person i love is gone.
i should've told her sooner, but i couldn't. because i didn't want people to hurt her.
so i did what i thought would make things better, not knowing that things could go worse.
i was afraid to be loved for who i am.
so now, i sat by the bathtub, turning the water off.
'the reason why i live is gone anyways.' i thought to myself.
with that, i slid down the back of the bathtub, lowering my head into the water, all the way down, until it took my final breath away.
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