Alicia de Pandora

Chapter II Broken

When I awoke I was surrounded by men in white clothes, sirens echoed around the confines of a small white looking room, the sounds of beeping came through “she’s awake”

“Careful now keep her stable, it's alright girl, you’ll be ok” my consciousness slipped again and when I regained it later I was on a hospital bed

“Aah, you're awake, is everything alright? How do you feel?” a nurse hovered over me with a concerned expression

“Where…am...I?” she looked over her notes

“You’re in the hospital, how do you feel? Do you remember anything?” I was trying to sort through the haze of memories to no avail “well I guess it cant be helped” she smiled “get some rest” she left the room and the atmosphere suddenly became dense and lonely my only company- the harsh methodical beeping of the life support machines, metallic sounds that emphasized how alone I was, my house was gone, family dead…I have nothing.

My trail of thoughts was interrupted by a sharp opening of the door “Ms Liddell I believe?” a man dressed in a brown suit entered the room and held up a badge “police, I’d uhh like to ask you a few questions about the manor you were found outside of earlier today” he pulled up a chair next to the bed and pulled out a notepad “let's begin” he started to ask me a lot of questions to which I could barely produce answers, my mind was too fuzzy for me to pick out anything, and if I did, it would be lost before I could utter a word, he placed a hand on me.

My body screamed and my mind felt like it was pulling itself apart.

I ripped out of his grip and fell to the ground with a hard thud; the cop rose and came closer.

My mind shook as the memories poured into my head, mincing my thoughts.

I screamed and screamed and screamed until a group of hospital attendees rushed it, practically shoving the cop out of the door, then the men clad in white advanced towards me ‘no, no…no, GET AWAY FROM ME!’ I screamed and shouted, squirming and convulsing, my arms were flailing in front of me as some kind of defence ‘LEAVE ME ALONE!’ powerful arms grabbed me from behind, I screamed even louder and threw my arm backwards, it was met by a dull thud as a man scowled in pain, releasing me from his grip, I ran forward darting between a few others into the furthest corner of the room where I sat curled into a ball

‘there, there’ a soothing voice captured my attention, the nurse from earlier fell into my sight, long golden-brown locks fell softly over worry clouded hazel eyes "its going to be ok" she ushered the other attendees outside and closed the door "can you talk to me about what happened? I want to help you" she smiled endearingly, I shivered, not from cold, but from fear of remembering the events that occurred earlier tonight.

I explained everything in painful detail, the words that left my lips felt like an elaborate story of fiction, I wouldn't be surprised if she disregarded my words as lies,though her face registered multiple emotions; Anger, sadness, horror, pity "I can't find a word to describe, the pain you must be in" she held me, as we embraced I broke down and succumbed to the tears I held back.

After the nurse left, my psychiatrist came in and took a seat away from the bed "I heard what happened, how are you feeling?" I didn't know how to answer, my body was in turmoil over multiple feelings; hate, sadness, anger, betrayal, pain, violation.

"Ms Liddell the staff tell me you haven't given them your name yet, is that true?" my name, oh, that, I can't, ugh I can't think, how can I forget something so important, I ripped through my mind, to find something, anything but I kept getting cut short "I-I can't..." he nodded

"I understand, is it like that dream? where no one knows your name, could it be that you've forgotten?" I was about to answer when a staff member came in declaring that visiting hours were over, after bidding good day, he left, and once again I was alone, with only the methodical beeping of the machines for company, I stared blankly at the sickly white wall paint as my mind drifted, until I heard voices from outside my room