Romancing the Sorcerer's Stone

Chapter 21: Silver Stars

Ginny sighs wistfully. "We're just afterthoughts, aren't we?"

Astoria smiles a sad half-smile. "I'm afraid not. For us to be afterthoughts, they'd have to think of us at all."

Ginny closes her eyes, swallows hard. "They don't, do they?" It comes out on a half-laugh, half sob.

"They're men, darling. What did you expect?"

"Why do you stay with him, then?"

Ginny opened her eyes in time to see Astoria shrug.

"He's not unkind, even if he doesn't love me. We're friends, even. His parents are kind to me. I was expected to marry well, you see. The proper pureblood princess. And Draco was my prince — we neither of us had much of a choice.

"What about Daphne?" Ginny tries to recall what little she knows of the older girl. They never really interacted at Hogwarts.

"Daphne went the other route. Ran off with some tech guy to America. A muggle — can you imagine? But he's handsome and wealthy, and he treats her like a princess. They're stupidly in love. She says it wasn't very hard to give up magic, after the War." She sighs. "Sometimes I hate her for it, for leaving me to live up to our parents' expectations for the both of us. Usually, I just hate myself for going along with their plans. Why can't I run off, too?"

Astoria gestures vaguely west with her teacup. "She's even invited me to live with her in California. Says there's plenty of rich men to go around."

"Why haven't you?" Ginny cradles her teacup close to her body, soaking up the welcome warmth. The room seems to have chilled while Astoria speaks.

"Because I—" She twists her fingers in her lap, firms her jaw, resolute. "Because I'm afraid of disappointing my parents, I suppose. And afraid of not liking it there and not being able to come home again. But mostly because... I'm afraid of having to find my own path, of what I might find along the way. Of course, I already know, but I'd be forced to admit that — that I don't actually like men, very much." Her lips twist wryly.

"You mean you're..."

She looks down, toying idly with her teacup. "Yes. I'm gay."

Ginny leans over and wraps her in a quick hug. "Me too. Well, Bi, I mean. Not that I've had enough attention from a man to count, of late."

Astoria snorts. "You're terrible. Thank you."

Things feel lighter, after that, and the conversation ranges widely as afternoon stretches into evening.

—

"Do you ever wonder what they see in us?" Ginny asks wistfully.

Astoria reaches out, tangles their fingers together. "Truthfully? I don't think they see us at all."

Ginny shivers, wrapping her arms tightly around herself, pulling Astoria in closer to her body like an afterthought.

"Does it feel colder in here to you?"

Astoria shrugs. "It always does, when Draco leaves. He may not love me, but it always feels as if the clouds have swallowed up the sun when he's gone."

She pauses, then adds delicately, "He shines brighter when he's with Harry."

Ginny chews her lip, nodding. "I know. Harry too. It's like... It's like they bring out the best in one another. It was the opposite, in school, but now that they're friends..." She frowns, as a thought strikes her. "If they're suns, what are we?"

Astoria smiles sadly. "You and I? We're moons, darling. Forever doomed to orbit 'round them and reflect their light."

Ginny's shoulders droop and she forcibly straightens her spine. She wants to slump down onto the couch, but won't let herself. "Yeah. That's rather what I thought."

They stand in silence for a moment, and then Ginny shakes herself, trying to shake away the somber mood.

"I can't take this anymore. Come on. Let's do something."

"Like what?" Astoria asks, amused, but there's a glint of what Ginny thinks might be interest in her eyes. She feels a flicker of warmth, something that feels a lot like hope.

"Well, they can't expect us to sit around all day doing nothing until they decide to grace us with their presence. I have no intention of playing the medieval princess — I despise needlework."

"I expect they don't realize we do anything at all when they're not with us. I'd be surprised if they remember we exist."

Ginny scowls, firming her jaw. "Yes, well. They're idiots, then. Come on."

"Where are we going?"

Her eyes are definitely sparkling now.

Ginny feels her mouth tug up into a sly smile.

"Dancing."

"Dancing? In this?" Astoria waves a hand down her body, covered in a mint-green dressing gown.

"Hmm," Ginny says, really looking at her, at the way the pale silk hides and reveals her curves as she moves. "You're right. That won't do at all. Here — let's get you something of mine. We're about the same size."

She laughs. "I've got a good three inches on you, darling. You're mad — It will never work."

Ginny smirks at her. "Well, then we won't have you wear my shortest skirt — and I'll be sure to wear my tallest heels."

—

She's wrong, Ginny thinks later, as they watch Harry and Draco whispering together and laughing into one another's shoulders at her mother's dinner table, never thinking to let the rest of them in on the joke. They may be suns, but we aren't moons. They dance around one another in a binary system, teasing and twirling, never quite touching. Astoria and I? We're distant stars watching enviously across the night sky as their eyes never stray in our direction.