unoriginal

c h a p t e r o n e

PLEASE LISTEN TO GLORIOUS - MACKLEMORE FEAT SKYLAR GREY FOR THIS CHAPTER.

Just a few months ago, the sound of my alarm clock would have induced loud groans and the sound of me whacking my hand around the bedside cabinet, trying to turn the awful death trap off. How things have changed. Since I pretty much decided to reinvent myself entirely and start a new life last September, I've gotten used to waking up at 5am every morning to work out, with a busy day of what I like to call "self amelioration" ahead of me. But today is a little bit different.

It's my first day at a St. Marcus' School of Auckland. I'm coming in as a senior. It's also my first day being truly the new me. The badass, hot, smart alec, totally-not-nerdy-and-doesn't-have-any-kind-of-interesting-past me that I've worked so hard to become. I'm going to use my brain and work hard, yeah, but I'm sure as anything not going to spend my last year of high school in a library hiding from social interaction. I'm going to be the one who always backs herself up and, with a bit of luck, the one who is more popular than a hot lifeguard on a sunny Californian beach. Today is exactly what I've been working for. And starting from today, I'm no longer Natalia Edwards, the girl who screwed up. I'm Stephani Green, the girl everyone wants to be. 

I roll my eyes at the fact that I haven't even gotten out of bed yet and my mind's rambling ways are already back. How the heck am I supposed to be calm and collected when I can't even think about alarms without my mind babbling on about school and being hot and summer and what not? What if someone sees through me? Surely one summer is not enough to totally reinvent yourself. Well I mean, technically I've had since September because that's when the incident happened, but moving from America all the way to New Zealand took ages, and I don't even know if I look different enough yet. I can pull off the whole nice/smart/fit thing, but hot and and a good talker? That was never my strong point. Being awful with my words is basically what got me into this whole thing.

Crap, I'm rambling again.

If I do that in front of someone popular, I'm going to look like an absolute idiot and screw everything up.

Oh come on, what's the worst that could happen? Absolute worst case scenario, you embarrass yourself and spend the rest of the year alone. It's one year. Plus you can hang out with all the friends you made through all your other activities if need be anyway. For goodness' sake, that's what you're gonna be a loner at school if you don't try this anyway. At least you're giving yourself a shot at some fun in senior year. 

Annd I'm back to rambling.

Just get out of bed dork.

Nope, it's cold and I don't want to.

JUST GET OUT OF BED YOU STUBBORN GOOSE.

A smirk crosses my lips, amused by my own thoughts. Stupid as it may be, listening to your mind argue with itself is quite the show. And I know everyone does it sometimes - even if they won't admit to it. 

I check my phone for the time. Five twenty two in the morning. Crap I'm late. Oh well. I think today I'll give myself the leeway of not doing my entire workout program; it is kind of a big day. Unlocking my phone, I check my Instagram and Facebook one last time. It's really weird looking at a social media account that has your face but that looks nothing like you at all. Or at least, nothing like the you that everybody used to know. 

Even the name is new; I legally changed it on the 27th of September. Stephani Green. Just a precaution. I always wished I was called Stephani anyway - I liked that you could have a sophisticated name for fancy events (Stephani), a short cute nickname (Steph), and a less girly nickname too (Stevie). I liked the name Charlotte for the same reasons.