Nathaniel Jean's Senior Year

15: Nathaniel Jean's Wishes

Tuesday, I️ continued my days as I️ had been for weeks. I️ kept my head down as Lucas passed, and when my friends decided to bother him, I️ turned a blind eye. Wednesday, too.

Thursday morning, I️ walked to class with Shawn as per usual, pretending to listen to him talk about his night out with Celia Looslie.

Of course, my mind was elsewhere. Specifically, I️ was thinking about the fact that, as of now, I️ was free this evening, which meant Lucas could come over.

"Where's your head right now, Jean?"

I️ blinked, shaking away my distraction, and hurried to find an adequate straight-guy response. "Madeleine Montgomery, that's where," I️ said, flashing Shawn a smirk. He grinned.

"No better place to be, man," he laughed. "But seriously, did you hear anything I️ just said?"

Now that I️ was out of danger, I️ figured honesty would do no harm and shook my head. "Nah, what'd you say?"

"I️ asked if Trevor talked to you."

Hoping that he wasn't referring to what I️ thought he was referring to, I️ said, "Dude, Trevor talks to me all the time."

Shawn rolled his eyes. "Yeah, but I️ mean on Monday. After practice. I️ asked him to talk to you. Did he?"

Dammit. "Uh, yeah."

"And?"

"And I️ think it's pretty dumb that you want me to be a jackass just to prove to you for the hundredth time that I'm straight—which, might I remind you, I shouldn't even have to prove in the first place."

Shawn shrugged. "If you don't like him, why is it an issue?"

"How about because I'm a good person?"

Shawn snorted. "Yeah, right, Jean. If you're a good person, I'm a good person. You gonna do it or what?"

The fact that my morality was just compared to Shawn's made me want to throw up. Not as much as the underlying threat in his voice did, though. "Dude, no," I️ said. "I'm not like that."

Shawn sighed. "I'm trying to be nice here, dude. Let's try this again. Stop being a pussy and prove that you're a fucking man, or I️ let everyone know you aren't. Kay?"

An anvil plummeted in my stomach. "Why are you still doing this?" I️ groaned tiredly.

"Just to be sure," he said simply. Then he nodded his head. "Look who it is. Perfect timing."

Only a few steps ahead, putting some books in his locker, was Lucas. I️ clenched my jaw. "Cut it out, Shawn," I️ grumbled.

"Might wanna start taking me seriously right about now," he said offhandedly. He stopped walking as we reached the spot where Lucas stood. Said boy didn't even turn to look at us.

That is, until Shawn "accidentally" knocked the books out of his hands, sending them tumbling to the floor, like a classic bully.

Lucas huffed and turned to Shawn with an annoyed eye roll. "Really, Shawn? Could that have been any more typical?"

Shawn, however, wasn't looking at Lucas. He was looking at me, and I️ could tell from his gaze that he really was serious. I️ do this now, or I️ deal with the consequences.