I'm Proud Of The Demon In Me (Ricky Horror)

Cobwebs

I turn the water on and let it run over body. The hot water feels wonderful on my cold body but it's not quite enough to calm me as my hands are still trembling. I have no clue why I suddenly got so nervous in front of her. I hate feeling so human, so weak, so frail. This is why I never tell anyone about my past. Especially when I was human. Being human caused me nothing but pain. It's something I'd rather forget but can't no matter what I try. Chris would always tell me to never forget the past but never dwell on it. He's right but it's so hard to not dwell on it and so much easier to forget it. I continue to think about all my past fuck ups especially the times I've tried to kill myself. The first time I attempted I jumped off a cliff into the ocean that didn't work. I discovered that I can survive really long falls and the fact that I don't actually need to breathe. There was that time not long before I stepped down from the order when I put a bullet in my head. Chris had to take me to a hospital to have the bullet removed. I proceeded to fully recover from that. Then there's the first time I tried slitting my throat. It healed almost instantly and it continued to no matter how many times I tried. Only scars remain as a reminder of that.

"Ricky?" I hear Katrina call through the door snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah?" I shakily reply.

"Are you alright? You've been in there a while." she asks her voice full of concern

"Ye-yeah, I'm-I'm fine." I stutter as I turn the water off.

"Okay." she says sounding unconvinced. The floorboards creak as she walks away slowly.

I wrap the towel around my waist without even bothering to dry off. I'm just so ridiculously lonely despite having Katrina the pain remains. I need to get back to the order even if if don't take my place back. I'm afraid of what I might do if I don't. Though I might do something stupid anyways but I haven't decided yet. I also should tell Katrina more about my past despite how much it pains me to remember it she deserves to know it all. I pull myself together and open the door.

"Katrina" I call out to her sitting on my couch looking quite distant. She looks up at me and I smile at her. "You can shower if you like. I'm going to get dressed and pack my stuff into the car."

"Okay" she states and slowly gets up and goes into the washroom.

It takes a little bit but I finally get all my stuff into the back of my car. I close and lock the trunk and walk back inside to find Katrina looking at my book shelf.

"Do you still have the spell book?" she asks curiously with one of her hands tangled in her wet hair.

"Yes, in fact, it's right here." I say as I pull it off the shelf and hand it to her.

"Oh cool." She says as she opens it to a random spot.

"Yeah I guess." I say glancing at the page "That actually happens to be the spell that was used on me."

"Oh my." she gasps and snaps the book shut and shoves it back on the book self. "That's terrible. What did it feel like?"

"What? Getting a demon soul bound to my own soul?" I say leaning against the book shelf

"Yeah."

"At first it felt like I was being ripped in half, but once the soul was settled in it felt wonderful. I felt complete again. It gave me so many new ideas and not to mention using the powers for the first time was extraordinary." I say smiling.

"She so pretty!" the voice in my head creepily whispers but I ignore it best I can.

"You keep mentioning that you have powers. What kind of powers?" she asks curiously like a child.

"I can reanimate corpses, my body regenerates and heals itself almost instantly, I have telekinesis, I have a little pyrokinesis, I can shape shift into what you'd call like a dark form I guess, I can alter the weather and I'm very skilled at using magic." I say nervously

"Oh my. Your quite powerful." She says with a smile

"You aren't afraid of me now?" I ask meekly. I'm confused as to why she's not scared. People are normally afraid of my powers.

"I have no reason to be, because you don't have a reason to hurt me." she says as she brushes my hair out my face and gazes into my eyes. After a few seconds her eyes wander down to the scars on my neck. It's in that moment I realize I truly do love this girl and would do anything for her.

"Kiss her." The voice whispers and I happily oblige. Pressing my cold lips her warm lipstick-stained ones. She starts kissing back almost instantly. Like she's been waiting for this for a long time. When I finally pull away I'm smiling like an idiot.

"I love you, Katrina." I say without hesitation and with complete sincerity.

She smiles and replies. "I love you too, Ricky, but now lets go I still really hate the forest."

I nod and we go out and get in my car. I was able to get it really cheap off this extremely religious couple.

"I know why this car is so familiar." Katrina in squeals excitement as she examines the necklace hanging from the rearview mirror. "This used to be mine. I know cause this necklace and these little cat plushies."

"Yeah the people I bought it off kept mentioning their awful demon daughter named Katrina. It was quite entertaining the ways they kept trying to convince me to not buy your car which confused me cause they were trying to sell it in the first place. I've come to realize those were probably your parents."

"Yeah they were never the brightest." She states smirking as we drive off down the long winding road.

"How long?" Katrina asks curiously

"10 hours" I state. "You'll probably want to get some rest."