Life sucks. Love sucks. Do you know that? Love really, really sucks. There is nothing about it that is good. Not anymore. There used be, but that´s gone. It is long gone. It always ends in fights. Every time we talk it ends in fights. There is no more love. She won´t even let me touch her anymore. Everything has changed. Everything does. We used to be best friends, that´s all gone. I regret now ever changing that. If we had just stayed best friends, we would still be talking and laughing together. We would still be fooling around. We would still be friends. On the other hand, I would still be miserably in love with my best friend who was dating another guy. Bah! Life sucks. Love sucks.
Josh raised his class to take another sip of the cold liquid but realized as it touched his lips that it was empty. He sighed and put the glass back down. He looked up at the bartender. “Another one!” he slurred out. The bartender dude raised his eye brows at him and sighed. “Sir, I think you´ve had enough. I think you should go home. Do you have anyone to pick you up or do you want me to call a cab?” the guy asked and put down the class he was polishing. “I don´t give a fuck about what you think! You give me the damn drink!” Josh shouted back at the poor guy. “Sir, calm down. I can´t serve another drink. Now, do you want me to call a cab?” he asked again. “You know what? I´m leaving. This is a stupid bar anyway!”
Josh got up and walked out of the bar. He stuck in hands in his pockets as he headed out into the chilly late October air. He walked down the street and headed for his apartment. The apartment that he shared with Jen. It was only a few blocks away. Josh looked at his wrist watch. It was 2:30 am. Jen would probably be sleeping already. She never stayed up late anymore. She was always tired.
When he arrived at the apartment and had unlocked the door, Josh was surprised when he saw Jen sitting on the couch. She turned her head and looked relieved to see his face. But she didn´t say anything. She just looked on as he took off his jacket and shoes. It was obvious that she was still upset. It wasn´t like she was angry at him, but more that she didn´t want to put more pressure on their already strained relationship. She was nervous as she sighed deeply and got up from the couch.
“We need to talk,” she said, breaking the awkward silence. Josh sighed too and walked back into the living room but stayed a good 14 feet from Jen.
As she started speaking again, Jen looked down at her sweaty hands. “I´m pregnant, Josh,” she said, still not meeting his eyes. It didn´t come out right because of the lump in her throat. She cleared it and tried again. “I took a test this morning after you left; I´m pregnant.”
Josh didn´t know how to react. At first, he was confused. “But it´s been months since we…” he trailed off, but he didn´t need to say more. “Then I must be months along,” Jen simply stated. “Cheating” wasn´t a word in her vocabulary, well, unless it was games of course, and Josh knew that.
Josh´s next reaction was frustration. How could this happen? How could he have let this happen? They had been careful each time. Jen was on the pills. How?
Next, was anger and fear. “I can´t take this. I´m not ready…I…” Josh didn´t say anymore. He turned and walked away from the girl he´d loved for the past 3 years; the girl he still loved. He put on his shoes again and grabbed his jacket and headed for the door. Before he left, he told her that he would be back to pick up his stuff in the morning.
Everything that Jen thought she could be sure of had just blown up in her face. She started shaking as the sobs took over her body. The tears were streaming down her cheeks as she fell to her knees.
