Josh was staying at his younger brother, Connor´s place. He had nowhere else to go. Well, yes, but that would be his parents´ place, and he was not going back there again, not at 24. This was why he had to put up with the comments of how stupid Connor thought he was. Connor´s girlfriend was no help either. She kept giving him a death stare and sometimes he would literally fear that she would stab him in his sleep. They were trying to make Josh step up and take responsibility. To make him call Jen again. It had been weeks since Josh left and they hadn´t heard anything from her in that time. Connor had always liked Jen and he was worried.
That night, after another fight with Connor and a few sharp comments in his girlfriend´s direction, Josh went out. He did this every night. He had nothing better to do and getting drunk made him forget. He could escape all the emotions. The guilt. The fear. The worry. Everything went away after the first few drinks.
Josh went to a local club. He had been there a few nights before, some girls recognized him and started flirting. He smiled and was about to just stay there and hang out with them all night, when he was taken aback by a person across the room.
Was that Jen? Was that a drink she was holding? No, Jen wouldn’t be that stupid. Josh brushed past the girls around him, ignoring the huffs coming from them. He crossed the dance floor, not knowing exactly what he was going to do when he reached the other side.
He knew that he was right when he was still 10 feet away from her. It really was her and it wasn´t just a soda that she was holding. The way she was acting; she wasn´t herself anymore. She wasn´t drunk, but she had let go of her reasonable self.
He couldn´t suppress the anger that built up inside him. He walked up to her and, without thinking, ripped the glass from her hand.
“What the heck?” Jen exclaimed, but fell silent when she got a look at the person standing in front of her.
“What do you think you´re doing? You shouldn´t be drinking!” Josh yelled at her, grabbing her arms. Jen soon ripped her arms from his grip. “What do you care? You left, remember?!” she yelled back with the same amount of anger as Josh. It had been building up inside her for weeks and was finally released.
“You can´t tell me what I can and can´t do!” she added. Josh was getting frustrated that she wasn´t seeing sense. This was so unlike her to act this way.
“Damn it, Jen! You´re pregnant for crying out loud! You´re hurting the baby! My baby!” This threw Jen completely off. “Your baby? You didn´t even want it!” she screamed at him. “I didn´t say, I didn´t want it. I said I wasn´t ready!”
“And you think I was ready? I was just as scared!” Jen stopped to take a deep breath to calm herself down a bit. Her throat was hurting. “You don´t have to worry about it anymore,” she whispered calmly, just loud enough for him to hear, and walked away.
“What the heck?” she could faintly hear Josh behind her. He followed her out of the club and was able to stop her in the parking lot. He made her turn around to look at him. “What do you mean? What the hell was that supposed to mean?” Josh asked with his voice still raised but he wasn´t yelling anymore.
“Just leave me alone!” Jen yelled. Her eyes filled with tears that she tried to blink away. “No! I will never leave you alone. Tell me what that meant!” he demanded. Suddenly his face twisted in disgust. “Did you…” he added as he had realized what it could mean.
“No! Of course not! I could never…” Jen replied. Her voice had been strong at the start but the last part was whispered. “Jen…please?” Josh begged, his voice suddenly sincere. Jen couldn´t hold back the tears anymore.
“I lost her, okay!” she screamed, making a few people around them turn to see what was going on. “Jen, what happened?” Josh asked, his voice now low and calm. He felt regret building up. He should have been there. He should have never left.
“I don´t know!” she screamed again and choked back a sob, her voice broken. “One minute she was there, kicking away, and then there was blood and it hurt…” she trailed off, filled with sadness again. She sobbed and didn´t try to hold back. Josh pulled her close and let her soak his shirt with her tears. He really should have been there for her. She had needed him more than ever and he wasn´t there. How could he have been so stupid?
A few minutes of silence passed. There was only the sound of Jen sobbing, her breathing slowly returning to normal and the tears eventually growing silent. Josh kept holding her, kissing her forehead. “What happened to us?” he asked. Jen was silent for half a minute before she replied. “We grew up, I guess.”
Josh sighed and pulled back. He looked into her blue eyes. “I don’t want to lose you. I never want to lose you.”
THE END
