Caring for Carers - Minizerk

Chapter 10

After the fiasco at lunch, the four decide to head out to the park. Ethan's back to a happier state, having received lots of cuddles and reassurances from Josh, so there's no animosity between them.

Not that Josh would ever be able to hold anything against Ethan. The kid is wonderful, and it was an accident. Ethan's got a habit of blaming himself though, and being worried that he's going to be punished. You can only wonder what he experienced while he was sectioned that led to him believing that, Josh thinks briefly, but he doesn't want to let his mind dwell on it. Although it is pretty important, there's more important things for him to do, like helping Ethan realise none of what happened was his fault, and giving him the opportunity for a happier life.

It's a bit cringeworthy, but Josh can't find it in himself to care. Not when he feels like he's on the mend. Normally, SAD is a complete bitch during the late autumn days, pulling him down too far.

All the way to the ground, like the leaves. Sometimes he feels like he's withering up and dying too.

This year though, it's been different. Tobi has always been there, stopping him from doing anything he'll regret. So have the kids at the school, because if he's honest, they were the only thing worth living for at his lowest points. But this year, the new faces and new relationships, the lessening sun and the burnt ambers and the pastel grey days have given him a new lease of life, one that he's grateful for.

At least, that's what Josh is thinking as he trudges through the park, Ethan on one arm while Simon and Vik walk slightly ahead, sticking to the muddied path, moving cautiously towards the play area, Simon holding open the gate for everyone once he's reached it.

Before the two let either of the boys go and play, Josh quickly checks any and all equipment for needles - you can't be too careful these days, particularly when caring for two lads uneducated in that department. After deeming it safe, Josh returns to the trio.

"Okay, off you go then."

Ethan runs off, his arms flapping happily at around his shoulder height, in the direction of the swings. Vik follows, a bemused expression on his face. He enjoys sitting on the swing and thinking, his feet rocking him gently by circling his ankles, so that he doesn't leave the ground.

Vik likes being grounded, but Ethan's enthusiasm is infectious, so he hesitantly seats himself beside the bigger boy, who giggles to himself, eyes clouded slightly, as if he's reminiscing.

He's probably thinking about his mum, Vik speculates, watching the wistful look in the other's eyes fade into... is that guilt? Vik's heart sinks. He gets it. You love your mum beyond belief, but you're having a great time without her.

It's just a shame his own mother doesn't love him.

That doesn't stop him from loving her, though.

~~~~

Simon makes his way over to a bench, Josh a few steps behind, having made sure both boys are safely on the swings. As he sits down, he yelps, making the bearded man laugh.

"What? It's flipping freezing!"

"Aw, baby." Simon pointedly ignores the way his heart flutters at that. "Maybe you should get a longer coat, then you can sit on the end."

"I'll sit on you in a minute."

"What happens if I don't sit down?"

Simon pauses, "that might ruin my plan a little bit."

Josh laughs, and proceeds to sit down next to Simon. Even through his thick coat, the coldness of the bench really is noticeable.

"Fuck me, that is cold."