May 14; My Day

Chapter One

I woke up to the sounds of my older sister shuffling around the room we shared, getting ready for her first day of junior year. The high school starts a week before the middle school, so I got to sleep in another week. "I'm just gonna take your beanie. Is that alright?" My sister whispered in my ear. I nodded my approval and watched her try to fix her already hat hair. My two little sisters, who I also happened to share a room with, came bursting through the door, making a lot of different weird noises. I wondered how they thought I was still sleeping. "Tay, it's time to get up." My mum said with that stern voice she always manages. I groaned and looked at her, while Tara, my older sister explained to her. This was going to be an interesting year.

A/N: So basically this is going to be a story about me, told in the eyes of band members. That's about all i have to say. Oh also all the chapters aren't going to be that short hehe

Chapter Two

I didn't exactly hate school these past few years, but I most definitely didn't enjoy it. And because of that, I woke up with a bit of a groin and a little need of a push to get out of bed, but I wasn't afraid or sad that I had to go to school. I walked past the front office, towards my group of friends. We all sat and talked until the beginning of school bell rang. All my friends were in eighth grade and I in seventh which made it impossible for us to have any classes together. Because of this, they had to settle for just giving me tips on mean teachers, dos and don'ts, etc. The entire day consisted of me sitting around counting the minutes till I got to go home and listen to blink-182 while I procrastinate doing first day homework. Thankfully, no one knew who I was at the time, which meant I didn't have to stick around after school talking to "friends." At exactly 3:18, because my school's times are really odd, I hurriedly packed up my stuff and shoved it in my backpack, running out the Industrial Arts door to the front of the school. "How was the first day of Orcutt?" Josh, from You Me At Six asked with a grin as he saw me bounding down the steps. I smiled a bit and pulled his beanie off his head in a teasing manner. "Hey! Give that back," He pouted. I had to admit, when he pushed his lip out like that, he looked adorable. Our plan for the year was that every day after school we all meet in the front and walk home together. Most of the time, we'd walk to Jack In The Box and waited till our mums told us to come home. I sloppily shoved Josh's beanie back on his head and asked if he was ready to walk home. When we reached the restaurant, Josh immediatley turned to his best friend Mitch, from Suicide Silence and begged for money for food. "You knew we were coming, you should've brought some yourself," Mitch said, trying to sound annoyed. Mitch and Josh had been best friends since anyone could remember, and everyone knew that neither could be mad at the other for more than two seconds. After Josh ordered, using Mitch's money, we all sat down and watched videos of stupid stuff that wasn't even really funny and ate our food. Me and Mitch lived on the same street, so we said bye to Josh when he reached his house and continued walking, talking about the bands we liked the entire way. Mitch always had looked out after me, and he had promised me he would always be there for me. As me and Mitch said our goodbyes, I looked down at the ground and thought, "This is gonna be a good year." 

A/N: So yeah there's that chapter also I don't own any of the bands or band members mentioned, though I wish I did

Chapter Three

After a few weeks of the school routine, I went home one day and opened Kik. I had a message from a girl from my school, Jess from The Summer Set. We talked for a bit and, my obsession taking over, I asked if she liked any bands. She named a few she liked, mostly boybands who didn't play any instruments, then asked me which ones I liked. I said my some of my favourites were Blink-182, All Time Low, Pierce The Veil, and We Are The In Crowd. She replied by saying she had a friend who liked the exact same bands, and that seemed pretty remarkable so I agreed to talk to her. Her name was Cassadee, and after we talked for a bit, we realised we were quite alike. We instantly clicked, and started hanging out more at school. She introduced me to her her group of friends, who all liked bands as well, and we all got along quite nicely. One of the girls though, Alex, really stood out to me. One day, I got invited to go to one of the girls houses after school. Alex was going, so I thought it'd be fun. We all walked to Jack In The Box, got food and sat around and talked. Alex was sitting at a table alone with Kellin Quinn. I overheard part of their conversation, and they were talking about cutting, and depression. I slowly walked up, not knowing if I was welcome or not, and said, "You guys are talking about depression huh? I know about that," and slowly walked away. I always acted like that, silly and goofy. That was how I convinced people I was happy. Everybody was sitting at different tables, so I just sort of walked from table to table, talking to everyone, joking around. After everyone finished eating and talking, we started to walk to Jenna Mcdougal's house. Jenna was loud and funny, so I was okay with going over even though we had practically just met. When we got there, everyone just sat down and got comfy, while I stood awkwardly. After Jenna practically forced me to sit next to her, they all started talking about the weirdest things. It was comforting to know that I wasn't the only one who thought these things. Jenna got up to do some odd thing or another, and Alex immediatley sat down next to me, making it obvious she wanted to talk. "How are you?" She asked, in that cute little high pitched voice of her's. I replied that I was good, following that with the same question. Alex had the same answer, though I doubted she really was good. When Jenna came back in the room, she threw a fit about Alex stealing her spot, yelling about how she wanted to sit next to me. After hanging out there a while, I got a text from my mum saying she needed me to come home and 'do something.' She knew I was at a friend's house, and she knew I was having a good time, so she wanted to make it bad for me. My mum didn't seem to like me very much, in fact she went out of her way to make my life a living hell. I stood up and said I had to leave, which produced a few sad sounds from the group. Jenna stood up to and hugged me good bye. I ended up going back, and we all just sat around and talked. That was one of the best days of my life, because I actually felt accepted, and even wanted at times. I also realised that day that Alex had a sweet spot for me. From that day on, I hung out with that group more and more, Alex always tagging along when she heard my name. 

A/N: I feel like this story is gonna be super predictable, but oh well. So yeah this is pretty much how the entire thing's gonna go. I hope you don't mind long chapters either because, damn, they're gonna be long.

Chapter Four

Me and Alex became really great friends, which was great for me. I didn't realise it until Lex said something, but Jenna very obviously wanted me all to herself. Me and Alex started hanging out more and more, bringing us closer and closer. I don't know why, but I trusted Alex with my life. I've never trusted anyone at all really before, so this was new. As me and Alex got closer, Jenna kept trying to claim me. It's not like I didn't like Jenna, I absolutley adored her. She was the older sister I never had, but sometimes she made me feel bad for being close with Alex. One night I was texting Jenna and Alex both, and I was teasing Alex about liking me, as I usually did. I knew she didn't really, I just loved to mess with her. As I sent a message to Jenna talking about American Horror Story, I got another from Alex. I looked at it with disbelief, thinking it was a joke, that she was messing with me. The message was her admitance to liking me more than a friend, a lot more, at that. Alex told me she loved me. After me telling her I was she shocked, she said "So is this the end, or are you going to be my new girlfriend?" I had never in a million years thought about dating Alex, or any of the girls for that matter. I thought I was completely straight, but after I gave it thought, I realised I was totally, hopelessly, in love with Alex. For the beginning of our relationship, it was super awkward, neither of us knowing if we were allowed to touch the other. After a bit we were settled in, and everything was so amazing. We got a lot of shit at school for it, but we never got busted for PDA because the teachers always turned their heads whenever we walked past. Alex and I hung out whenever possible, Jenna still trying to lure me away from her. The group said they were happy for us, but it seemed like they didn't approve. They stopped talking to us outside of school, then completely. Alex and I couldn't care less at the time. Days went by, and then weeks. Alex and I were the happiest couple anyone had seen. But as mine and Alex's relationship got better, mine and myself's relationship got horribly worse. I hated myself for every little thing. Before, I only dislliked a few parts of me, but I was an okay human. But for some reason, as I got more and more settled into the school year, I started to absolutely despise myself. It made me extrememly sad, but I couldn't figure out why. So I went on through the year, hating everything about myself. I took up cutting myself a long while ago, but I had been clean for a few months, the first few months I had been dating Alex. As I fell deeper and deeper into my horrible depression, I started to look forward to cutting again. At school, I'd think about what I was going to do when I got home. That disgusted me, so when I actually got hold of my blade, I'd take out everything I was feeling on my arms and thighs. Alex was getting upset because she could see the marks, and she felt like she couldn't help. I didn't know what to do, I just wanted to sleep forever. 

A/N: Yeah so this is where this story starts getting real, and I'd like to say that everything I say is true. So have fun reading about my life, I guess :)