Past and Present - A Modern Day Romance of North & South

CHAPTER SEVEN - FLEDGLING BEGINNINGS

As the events of the previous evening began to settle into place, Margaret’s stomach somersaulted in exquisite remembrance.  After her encounter on the landing with John last night, with nothing more than a towel to conceal her from his probing gaze, it had been a shock to realise just how out of kilter her heart and mind had become with regard to him.

Turning onto her back in bed, she languidly watched a shaft of sunlight extend its illuminating brilliance across the smooth white surface of the ceiling, indolently tracing its source to the bedroom window where it had found a narrow slit at the central point where the curtains met. Its very ability to find a means of entry into her room reminded her of John’s stealthy ability to enter her own heart. She hadn’t even been aware of it happening, not consciously at least, too entangled in her dislike of the man to actually acknowledge the subliminal echoes whispering beneath all the morosity. She hadn’t known how to react to him last night when she’d finally managed to calm herself enough to go downstairs where he'd been waiting with her parents in the lounge. She'd hardly been able to bring herself to even look at him, much less to speak, even though she had guessed that he’d been watching and waiting for some sort of response from her for most of the evening.

Only when the meal had finished had they actually talked, although when he’d offered her the job at the hotel she’d been completely stunned. It had come out of nowhere, with no hint of a preamble that might have alerted her to its coming. At first she had suspected that he was teasing her in some strange, perverted way, trying to gauge what her reaction would be, but just the earnest turn of his expression had made her realise that this had not been the case. Yet it had seemed to her such a ludicrous suggestion! Even in the virgin light of a fresh day it still seemed ridiculous! She had promised him that she’d consider his proposal and since then she had done little else but think. It had been the last thing that her exhausted brain had thought about last night and it was the first thing she'd thought of this morning and it still didn’t make any sense. Of course, had the job been presented to her from any quarter other than from John Thornton then her response would have been very different. She would have been delighted at the prospect of finding a job which, although not permanent, would keep her occupied for a good few months to come. But how on earth could she work for a man who had always instilled such dislike in her and had the unnerving power to pull her so eloquently into his orbit? What’s more, how could he think that it could possibly work? Their relationship – and that was a description which pushed it to the absolute limit – had been just one jarring clash after another. Surely two people with that sort of history, especially where one was an employer and the other an employee, couldn’t exist in a state of happy harmony for long?

Her suspicious mind suspected that it was unlikely he’d offered her the job out of pure generosity of spirit, that he might have acted with some ulterior motive, although she found it almost impossible to reconcile herself to the notion that maybe he felt something for her. She had been too frightened to find out, the magnitude of her own leap towards conciliation quite enough for her to take in at the time. The heady recollection of his eyes upon her brought a blush to her cheeks even now, so much so that she found herself pulling the duvet under which she was snuggled further up around her, as if to hide from her own emotions. His eyes, so very blue and capable of setting ablaze everything they came to rest upon, had finally melted away the glaciers of her freezing disapproval, leaving an inferno of raw aching desire bubbling frenetically in its wake. She didn’t know what to do with herself. Half the time she wanted to throw her arms around his neck in a very blatant display of her as yet undisclosed feelings for him and the next she was hesitating like a timid deer, forever wary of falling prey to an unseen assailant. Her relationship with Henry hadn’t prepared her for what she felt now. She was falling for a man for whom she had thought she could never actually like as a person. How could anything have prepared her for that?

Just because he’d managed to master the arctic wastes of her feelings did not necessarily mean that they could actually work together either! She found herself rolling every possible scenario through her head, endeavouring, somewhat unsuccessfully, to find a clear-cut answer as to the action she should take. It was true that she had the benefit of knowing Bess and Nick - and John, who had appeared such a different person last night to the one she normally found herself encountering. Yesterday evening he had appeared softer, more genial and considerate. He had even managed to charm her mother, which had been no easy task in itself! What was he - some sort of magician or wizard with the power to turn women who’d previously held him in such cold contempt into quivering wrecks of confused adoration? What spell had he cast over her that made her heart leap just at the thought of him?

The morning light behind the curtains was growing stronger, seeming to strain for unhindered passage into the room, forming a blazing aureole around the edge of the window. She threw back her duvet abruptly, suddenly hungry for the inspiration of the new day, and padded decisively towards the window in her pyjamas. With one tug she ripped the curtains sharply apart, permitting the sunlight to breach the boundary that had just now been denied it, drawing in her breath and closing her eyes, basking, for a few moments, in the unfettered and simple pleasure of being at the heart of the warm glow cascading over her.

***

By eleven o’clock Margaret was walking into the foyer of the Milton Hotel, passing through the double doors which had been pulled back as if to embrace all those who passed through them. She had spent the past hour and a half just wandering aimlessly around the town before finally sitting in a coffee shop staring down at a mug of untouched black coffee, wishing fervently that it held the power to still the butterflies softly circling around her stomach. She had told her parents that she was just popping out for a walk, but had made no mention to them about what John had said to her last night. She still couldn’t get it straight in her own head!

“Margaret! What are you doing in this neck of the woods?”

She had forgotten that it was Bess’s shift on reception. She now wondered how to begin, hesitating for an instant before explaining. “I’ve come to speak to John – Mr Thornton,” she said, speaking his christian name aloud for the first time. It felt strange to say it, even though she had started to think of him as John in her mind rather than Mr Thornton. It seemed so intimate, as though she had crossed some sort of invisible boundary.