A Look Through These Eyes

If you could see through her eyes,

You'd find an old soul.

All torn,

All worn.

Hurt inside.

Still trying to hide,

From all the pain within

The hate and the rejection.

The lies and imperfection.

Her heart is trying to escape her chest,

Her heart wants to leave.

She wants to leave, too.

She doesn't like it here anymore.

But she can't leave.

And neither can her heart,

So she closes her eyes.

And if she wakes up again, she'll restart.

She didn't want to wake up,

She didn't want to do it anymore,

But she woke up,

And when she did,

She bit her tongue,

And held it in.

She smiled while,

She hurt within,

Her Happiness

was come and go,

But the pain she held

Stuck like snow,

there it'd stay,

The suffering: hidden away,

Her secrets, her pride,

She locked them inside,

After all,

It was the safest place to hide.

And she felt deprived.

Deprived of happiness.

She could see it all around her.

She could feel it deep inside.

It felt real good inside.

But it didn't feel genuine.

It felt like someone just stuck it there inside of her.

It felt misplaced.

She liked being happy, don't get me wrong.

But it was starting to feel fake.

Everything was starting to feel fake.

The walls around her.

The floor beneath her.

The songs leaking out from behind her closed door.

She didn't know anymore.

She felt like she could cry an ocean

And still have leftover tears

She felt like she could overcome

And still have leftover fears

She felt like she could cut so deep

And still have leftover pain

She felt like she could jump and die

And it'd all still be the same.

Her heart thumped,

And her checks drowned,

Her eyes closed,

She was going down.